Leave Me With My Sins
by My one true love
Summary: AU. Puck started dealing drugs when he was a teenager after his mother kicked him out of the house. He'd never seen a problem with his career choice - or at least he hadn't until he met Rachel Berry.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N: Hello readers! This is my first multi-chapter story in awhile. It is finished (I made sure that I finished before posting) and I'm really hoping that you like it. It of course is AU and completely from Puck's POV. I'd like to thank my beta: written in dreams for being so amazing. Also I don't own Glee, just the idea. Rating is due to excessive bad language & mature !_

_Please read & reviews. Reviews make my day._

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_Fuck my life._

Puck grabbed his phone, looking at the caller ID. He didn't recognize the number, which meant that he had to answer. He sat up, jostling Santana whose head was in his lap as she gave him head. "Hello?" He stood up, waving off Santana as he pulled up his pants.

"Ummm…yeah, I was given your number from a buddy of mine. He told me that I'd be able to score from you."

Puck almost laughed out loud. The kid's voice was shaking, he must be scared shitless. This was obviously his first time trying to score. But he didn't want to scare the kid so he hid his amusement. "Yeah, you can. What are you looking for?"

"Ummm…some Ecstasy?"

Puck strode across the room, pulling open his closet and quickly opening his safe. "Yeah, I've got some X. How much are you looking for?"

"I dunno, enough for me and a few friends?"

This time Puck did laugh. "Okay I'll bring enough. Tell me your name and address and I'll bring it on over." He scribbled down the name (Finn Hudson, what the fuck kind of name was that anyways?) and the address (he recognized it from past runs, it was at one of the college frat houses) before snapping the phone closed.

"You're leaving?" Santana whined from where she still sat on the floor.

Puck rolled his eyes. If she wasn't such a good lay, there was no way Puck would put up with her. "Not just yet." He sank back into the chair where he'd been sitting. "You gonna take care of this or what?" He gestured from her to his lap.

Santana gave him a wicked grin as she crawled on all fours until she was kneeling between his legs. "What do I get if I do?"

"My gratitude?" Puck raised his eyebrows at her, watching as her lower lip slid out into a pout. Hot damn, she was hot. Even her pouting made him hard. "Well what do you want then?"

"You know what I want." Santana tilted her head to the side, her hair spilling into his lap.

Puck sighed. "Fine. Finish it and then I'll get you high and fuck you until you don't remember your name."

She lifted her hand, grasped the side of his pants and pulled them back down. Looking up at him she slowly slid her mouth over him, taking just the tip of him in while her hand began to stroke the base of him. His hands slid into her hair as she took more of him into her mouth. Her mouth and hand working in tandem, she began to pick up the tempo, causing his hands to tighten in her hair.

Puck knew that he was close, so he began to thrust into her mouth, forcing her to take in his whole length. He came in a rush, a groan slipping from his lips as he let his hands slip from her hair. His head slid back onto the back of the chair as he tried to slow his breathing. Not only was Santana a good lay, but she gave the best head he'd ever had in his life. He looked down at her to see her licking her lips. She'd never deny liking to give head. Not his girl.

"Now?"

Puck rolled her eyes. But damn if she wasn't annoying when she was sober. He liked her best when she was high because then she wasn't complaining about being sober. "Yes." He went back to his closet, pulling out a baggie of white powder and another bottle of pills. He tossed the pills to Santana and watched as she popped two. He shook his head. Sometimes he wondered if she only used him for his drugs because it seemed like that was all she ever wanted.

Not that he, of course, had anything against drugs. It was how he made his money so that he could keep up the lifestyle he enjoyed. He'd also been known to sample his own goods, but he didn't have to have it like Santana did. He did it every once in awhile to let loose and enjoy himself, but she had to do them every day. He shrugged off his thoughts as he walked over to the table, opening the baggie and spilling some of the contents onto the mirror he had there for just this reason. He quickly formed two lines, gesturing to her. "Ladies first."

Santana grabbed the rolled up bill that was sitting beside the mirror, quickly sniffing the line. She sat back up, rubbing her nose before she tossed the bill to Puck. He leaned down, sniffing the other line. He set the rolled up bill onto the table before sitting back, waiting for the drugs to take effect. Within fifteen minutes he could feel the high settling over him, and as he glanced over at Santana he saw that she was feeling it as well.

"Come here," he growled.

Santana crawled across the floor until she was kneeling in front of him. He leaned down, kissing her hard. There would be nothing soft about their joining that night. He hadn't been kidding when he'd said he was going to fuck her so hard that she forgot her name.

Puck reached down, yanking her shirt over her head. Now she was there in front of him in nothing more than her thong. Hot damn, did she have one fucking hot bod. He leaned down, taking one of her nipples into his mouth. He swirled it around as he reached down, ripping her thong from her. Santana was mewling as he switched his mouth to her other nipple as she struggled to pull down his pants. He pushed her onto her back, kicking his pants off as he did so. He lifted his mouth from her breasts to watch her face as he slipped first one and then two fingers into her.

Puck groaned. She was so fucking hot and wet, obviously ready for him. He changed his mind about the position and pulling them both up he bent her over the table. Damn she had one gorgeous ass. In one swift move he slammed into her all the way to the hilt. Her back arched as his hands dug into her hips. Her cries became louder as he increased his tempo, but they were drowned out by the music from the other room. Her hands rubbed her nipples and he knew that both drugs had set in and that it wouldn't be hard at all to make her come. He slipped one hand around, flicking his finger over her clit. It took just a moment, with just a few flicks of his finger, for her to spill over the edge. His name was a scream from her lips, along with 'Oh God.' And he had to admit, that he didn't mind his name being used in the same mouthful as God. He got a better grip on her hips, sliding in and out of her as her walls milked him. His tempo became a little faster, a little off kilter as he neared the edge himself. He slammed into her once more, spilling himself inside of her.

He pulled out almost immediately after coming and headed for the bathroom, leaving her sprawled across the table. He needed to get cleaned the fuck up so that he could go take care of this kid.

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Puck stepped out of his bedroom to find a roomful of people that he didn't know. Well, he did know some of them, but for the most part they were strangers. Not that this was different from any other night. His apartment was always full of people he didn't know, partying. He didn't give a fuck as long as they were paying for their favors. He nodded to his boy Matt who was dancing with a girl (who he had to admit was really fucking hot) and then his eyes found Santana.

It wasn't even fifteen minutes after he'd gotten done fucking her and already she was on some guy's lap, grinding against him. Not that this was unusual. They may be together, but they were never good at only having one partner. It was something that they both knew about one another and accepted. She could fuck whomever she wanted and so could he. It was a nice arrangement.

He motioned to Matt to let him know that he was going out and had almost made it to the door when a hand on his arm stopped him. He turned around to Santana standing there.

"Where are you going?"

"Dude, you were there when I got the call. I need to make a delivery."

Santana rolled her eyes. "No shit. But _where_?"

"The campus, one of the frat houses. Why?"

"I'm coming." Santana slid her arm through his and started to drag him towards the door.

Puck stopped, knowing that she couldn't drag him if he didn't want her to. "Who said I wanted you to come?"

"Puck, c'mon. I wanna see the hot frat boys." Santana smiled up at him as she ran a hand up and down his chest.

God, if she thought that was going to change his mind, she was dead wrong. But he couldn't see the harm in letting her come along. She was very good at distracting any men that bothered him. "Why the fuck not? But when I say we leave, we leave."

Santana shrugged. What did she care? If she wanted to stay, she'd stay, but she wouldn't argue with him and he knew that. She did what she wanted when she wanted to and there wasn't a whole lot that anyone could do about it.

As they drove over to the campus, Puck's thoughts were drawn back in time and he found himself wondering if his ten year old self would ever had guessed that he'd end up selling drugs for a living. Probably not, but then that was before his life had gone to shit.

His dad had left when he was ten and his sister had only been a four. From there, life had been hellish. His mom started bringing home a new boyfriend every week or so and they weren't usually very nice. Most of them would knock his mom around and a few even knocked him around. He'd started partying when he was twelve, drinking and doing drugs. But eventually he'd grown up and hadn't taken too well to one of his mother's boyfriends trying to beat the crap out of him. He'd knocked the shit out of the guy and his mother had kicked him out of the house.

It still pissed him off that his mom had chosen that fucking loser (who had dropped her a week later anyways) over her own son. So he'd ended up on the streets and dealing was the only way that he knew to make money. Now, he did quite well for himself, had a decent apartment and a nice car. He could buy whatever the hell he wanted to. But he'd never forgiven his mother, not that she seemed to care. According to his sister, all she did was drink all the time and still brought home a bunch of losers. He'd hoped for better for his sister, but he knew that she slept around (half the time with his friends) and partied all the time. But how was she supposed to know any better when her mom and brother did the same thing?

Fuck. Why was he thinking about this shit? That was in the past and it needed to stay there. He focused his attention back on the road. He was coming down from his high, which was why his thoughts were straying to the past. This is why he didn't do drugs often; because coming down was a bitch. To make himself forget, he reached across the car, grabbing Santana's hand and shoving it into his crotch. She'd have no problem getting him off while they drove to the campus, and it would surely take his mind off of things.


	2. Chapter 2

_Hello all! Here is the second chapter. First and foremost I'd like to say thank you soooo much for the reviews, favorites & story alerts. But I would ADORE more reviews. Lol. Rachel makes her appearance in this chapter. Please let me know what you think. Also I own nothing, sadly Glee belongs to others...although I'd LOVE to own Mark. Yum. Lol. Enjoy!_

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"C'mon San, let's go find this idiot." Puck sighed as he stepped out of his car, looking up at the frat house where people were spilling out onto the grass and the music could probably be heard two blocks down.

Fuck, he hated going to frat houses. The guys at these parties were always such idiots, thinking that they were big and bad. But really they weren't. He'd gotten into multiple fights with frat guys and they'd realized rather quickly that they weren't as big and bad as they had thought they were.

Santana snaked a hand through his arm, smiling up at him. "I'm ready."

Puck fought not to roll his eyes. She may have just gotten him off in the car, taking his mind off of thoughts of the past but she still annoyed the fuck out of him half the time. Why had he let her come with him again? Fuck if he could remember at this point.

He headed into the house, avoiding the people that swarmed around him. He flipped open his phone, sending a text to the guy, what was his name again? Oh right, Finn. He got a reply almost instantly telling him to meet him in the kitchen. He pulled Santana behind him until they reached the kitchen.

Inside stood a tall guy with sandy brown hair and a goofy grin on his face. What the fuck was he grinning about? Ugh, what a fucking moron. "Finn?"

"Yeah, that's me." Finn's eyes wandered over to Santana, his eyes widening.

Puck knew that look. Guys always ended up falling all over themselves when they saw Santana. Even he had to admit that she was gorgeous. She had thick black hair that fell down to her mid-back, haunting deep brown eyes that were only made more haunting by the makeup that she wore, pouty lips painted red and a lush body that was barely covered by the miniskirt and cropped tank top that she wore. She made heads turn wherever she went.

Puck pulled the bottle from his pocket, tossing it to Finn who was so busy staring at Santana that he didn't even see it. The bottle bounced off his chest and fell to the floor. Puck rolled his eyes as he watched Finn pick them up, but his eyes never left Santana.

"How much was it?"

Puck quoted a price and watched as he pulled out a wad of cash before passing it to him. His eyes went to Santana's and found that she was begging him with his eyes, begging him to let her play. He shrugged and watched as a wicked grin spread across her face.

She walked over to Finn, trailing her hand down his chest. "I'm Santana and if you're willing to share then I'm willing to screw your brains out."

Puck almost laughed out loud as he watched the other boy's mouth drop open. He recovered more quickly than Puck would have thought, saying, "But…ummmm…I got these for me and my girlfriend to try."

Santana's grin only widened. "Oh, that doesn't bother me. I like girls too."

This time when Finn's mouth dropped open he couldn't seem to find his words. He stood there with his mouth wide open, just staring at Santana. Or at least he was until a voice sounded from the doorway.

"Finn, you're an idiot." A petite brunette made her way into the room. "First, what made you think that I'd do drugs _with_ you when I told you that if you did them again. Second, do you really join you in a tryst with _her_?"

"Ummm…" Finn stuttered as he turned to face the brunette. "I thought you were kidding about the drugs? And maybe?" He gave her a half smile.

The girl rolled her eyes. "I was most definitely not kidding about the drugs. And as for the other? I'm not even going to comment on that." She shook her head sadly. "We're through Finn."

For his part all Puck could do was stare. She was beautiful. Her dark hair fell down her back, her brown eyes were alive with fire and she was wearing the oddest of outfits: a short plaid skirt, knee high socks and a v-neck sweater. Since when was the Catholic school girl look back in? Not that he was complaining; she looked good in it.

Suddenly she spun on him. "And _you_. What kind of person are you selling drugs?" She threw her hands up in the air. "Forget it." Without another word she spun on her heel and stalked out of the room.

Puck turned to face Finn and Santana. "Who was that?"

"My girlfriend – or I guess ex-girlfriend."He grinned down at Santana and Puck knew that he was thinking that he could probably get lucky with her. And to be completely honest, he probably could. "Rachel."

"She's fucking psychotic." Santana laughed, turning her face up towards Finn's. "Ya know if you want I can totally do the X with you."

Puck rolled his eyes. Fuck this. He wasn't going to sit here and watch this happen. He turned and headed out of the house, catching sight of the brunette walking down the sidewalk. He didn't know what made him do it, but he found himself following her.

She suddenly spun on her heel to face him. "Why are you following me? I should warn you, I have mace."

Puck couldn't help it, he started laughing. A look of confusion crossed her face as she tried to figure out what his deal was. "I don't know why I followed you. Maybe I just wanted to make sure that you made it home alright?"

"Oh right," her voice dripped with sarcasm, "because drug dealers are always trying to make sure that I make it home in one piece."

The smile slipped from his face. "Yeah, about that. So what if I'm a drug dealer. You don't know me. You don't know why I do what I do."

"I don't have to know you to know that you don't have to sell drugs to get by. No one does. It's a choice that you make. Do you think so little of yourself that you think that you can't do anything else but sell drugs?" She shook her head. "That's sad."

Puck could feel the anger building. "I think very highly of myself, thank you very much. And I didn't have a choice but to deal. My mom kicked me out and I was living on the streets, what the hell else was I supposed to do?"

Now it was her turn to laugh. "Why not get a job? A _real_ job," she cut him off when he opened his mouth to respond. "It's not like there aren't any out there. You could even go to a fast food joint. I mean, really! It's just so frustrating that the people in our generation feel like they're not good enough to do something better with themselves. It's a travesty."

All Puck could do was stare at her as she went on and on. He had tuned out her words, his eyes trained on her lips (that would NOT stop moving). He didn't recall moving or even the thought crossing his mind, but suddenly his lips were on hers.

When she didn't fight, he slid and arm around her waist and pulled her closer. Her hands were trapped between them but she didn't struggle as his tongue slid into her mouth. Damn, she was a good kisser. And that body of hers? Beyond hot. He pulled her closer still until she was pressed against his entire body.

Suddenly she stiffened and the hands that were trapped between them were pushing against his chest. Puck pulled back, confused.

Her eyes were wide as she stepped back. "Oh, God." She shook her head as if she was trying to deny what had happened. She stared at him for a second before turning and running down the sidewalk.

"Wait!" Puck called after her. "Rachel!"

He saw her glance over her shoulder, probably surprised that he had known her name. Fuck, he hadn't meant to scare her off. He just hadn't been able to resist kissing her (not to mention shutting her up). And now all her knew about her was her first name. Damn, he'd royally fucked this one up, hadn't he?


	3. Chapter 3

_Hello readers! I'm so happy that so many people are reading my story. For all you lovely people who have reviewed: I love you! For those who have favorited and alerted the story but I'm begging you to please review. I adore reviews and I like to know what you guys think! Anyways onto the story. I love you all!_

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_This was fucking crazy and Puck knew it, but it had been two weeks since he'd kissed her. Rachel. He still didn't know her last name, but he assumed that she went to the college since her boyfriend did. It wasn't much to go on, especially considering the amount of girls named Rachel that had to be attending the college.

He hadn't been able to get her or their kiss off of his mind since that night and it had been driving him crazy. Two days ago he'd started trailing that douche who'd called him from the frat. What the hell was his name? It was some dumb name. Flint? Trent? Oh right, Finn. He'd been following him around all day to no avail. It was obvious that he was no longer dating Rachel. He'd known that she was a smart girl. But he didn't have any other clues of how to find her, so he kept hoping against all hope that he'd see her; they'd had to have met somewhere right? He was hoping that it was in class so that following this dude would pay off. But fuck if he wasn't bored out of his fucking mind.

At the moment he was sitting at a table in the quad, pretending to read the paper that he had open in front of him, but his eyes were on the door that Finn had disappeared into almost an hour ago. It was getting late in the day and he had things he had to do, but he had to wait to see if she was in this class. If she wasn't, then maybe he'd give up – although he honestly didn't know if he could.

Suddenly the door flew open and people began pouring out, but he didn't take notice of them because they weren't his Rachel (yes, he was calling her _his_ Rachel because that was how he saw her in his head). He was just about to give up when the door swung open and there she was.

Puck had been beginning to wonder if he'd built her up in his mind, but he hadn't. She was just as breathtaking as she had been that night. Before he could even register what was happening, he was on his feet and striding towards her. She was talking to another girl until she looked up and saw him. So many things crossed her face as she stared at him: curiosity, recognition, confusion, fear. She stopped short and waved the other girl off just before he reached her.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Rachel looked around, pulling her bag closer to her.

Puck smirked. "I didn't like how we left things so I thought that I should find you."

"So what? You're stalking me?" Her eyes were wide.

"Uhhh…no…not exactly." He shook his head. This was so not going the way he had planned. What was it about this girl that threw him off his game so much? "Look, I've been thinking about you and that kiss for the last two weeks. There was something there, you know there was. So I just had to find you so that we could see what it was." He paused, trying to gauge her, but unable to get any kind of reading of what she was thinking. "So I was thinking that maybe we could go out sometime?"

Rachel burst out laughing. "That is so wrong for so many reasons." She shook her head, turning to walk away.

Puck's hand shot out, gripping her arm. "What are you talking about?"

"Well, let's see." She shook his hand off of his arm. "Number one, I do not think that your _girlfriend_ would appreciate you going out with someone else."

"Girlfriend? I don't have a – oh, you're talking about Santana aren't you? Yeah, _totally _not my girlfriend, so that is not a valid reason."

She shrugged. "Fine, I don't even know your name."

"Well that's easy enough to fix." He stuck out his hand. "Puck."

"Puck? Your parents named you _Puck_?" Rachel stared down at his hand like it was a snake that might bite at any time.

Puck shook his head. "Well no, it's a nickname from my last name. My real name is Noah Puckerman, but I never go by Noah."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Surprise, surprise." She rolled her eyes. "Well neither of those things really matter because the _real_ reason I won't go out with you? It's simple, I don't date drug dealers." She gave him a small smile that was more smirk than smile. "I was just trying to be nice, but that's the truth, so deal."

This time when she turned to go he didn't stop her – he couldn't. What was he supposed to say? He was a drug dealer, it was what he did. He couldn't deny it and there was no changing it, so what good would it do?

She stopped suddenly, looking over her shoulder. "Oh and don't find me again because I _will_ get a restraining order. Being a drug dealer is bad enough, but if you add stalker onto it? There's no way that you'll ever have a chance with any girl." With that, she flounced off, leaving him staring off after her.

Xxx

Where the hell did she get off? He wasn't a fucking stalker (okay so he kind of was, but what the fuck ever. He wasn't ever going to admit that.) and even if he was, what right did she have to be up on her high horse, looking down on him. Fuck that. She could kiss his white ass.

Puck had been seething since he'd left campus and his afternoon had not gotten any better. One of the guys he had working for him had lost 50k in merchandise and they were going to have to figure out where the hell to get the money to cover it. Why the hell did he even bother? It was a question that he found himself asking more and more since the night he had met Rachel.

No, he was not going to start thinking about her. And who gave a flying fuck what she thought of him? But even as that thought passed through his brain, he knew the answer. He did. She was the first person in years who had given a crap about what he did – and she didn't have any reason to care. It took the concern of a complete (and hot) stranger for him to wonder what the hell he was doing with his life. He'd never thought that there was anything wrong with the way that he lived his life, but now he just didn't know. He found himself questioning everything that he did.

Damn it, how had she been able to get under his skin so easily? He'd had what, two whole conversations with her? So why couldn't he get her or her words out of his head? It was ridiculous – he was ridiculous. There had to be something wrong with him, right?

He groaned, running a hand over his face. This line of thought was getting him nowhere. He needed to figure out where to come up with the money to cover the lost shipment – he knew that he had the money to cover it, but it would leave him with next to nothing and that wasn't a feeling that he liked. He liked having money. He liked to do whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted. It was hard to do that when you were broke.

He needed to get his mind off of things for awhile, this was getting him nowhere. Shit, even his thoughts were running in circles. He jerked up the newspaper that had been left on his table and flipped it open. A page fell out and he picked it up. It was the Classifieds section. Just what he needed, another reminder that he didn't have a normal job and obviously wasn't good enough for snotty Rachel.

Puck almost threw it down, but something caught his eye and he found himself reading.

_Out of work? No experience? Need to make good money? Not afraid of hard work?_

_We've got the job for you. _

_Call (419) 555-0149_

_Hart Construction_

Wait. Why in the hell was he reading a want ad? He had a job – one that probably paid better than that stupid one. He threw down the paper in disgust. He told himself to not think about it again, not to ponder the idea of going straight. He'd always made fun of the ones who did – went straight that was – so why was he considering it? The answer was one word and made no sense. Rachel.

He didn't know her. He shouldn't care what she thought. And that's what he told himself the rest of the day whenever the thought came to him that maybe he should give it a shot. And somehow time and time again it did come back to him. No matter how far back he pushed it, it kept coming to the forefront of his thoughts and he hated it. By the time his head hit the pillow that night, he'd made a decision that would affect his life forever.


	4. Chapter 4

_Hello readers! I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has reviewed, favorited or added an alert for this story. Sorry about the lack of update, I'm on vacation so it threw me off. Lol. Please let me know what you think of the story!_

_Thanks to my beta writtenindreams3. You're awesome! Now onto the story. Remember please read and review! =)  
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_Six months later_

Summer had come and gone while fall was just starting to bloom around them. Puck sighed as he shaded his eyes and looked around the college campus. The last time he'd been here he'd been forced to make one of the biggest choices in his life and every day he was thankful to the beautiful brunette who'd forced him to take stock on his life and realize that it was coming up short. A brunette that he'd been hoping he'd see again when they'd started this job two weeks ago, but there was no sign of her so far. But really with the amount of students on campus what could he expect?

"Puckerman! Stop daydreaming and get back to work," Sam, one of his co-workers, called out to him.

Puck just flipped him off and grinned before turning back to the job at hand. Construction wasn't easy work – especially when the sun was glaring down on them and the temperatures soared as they had during the summer. Thank God for the fall. Temperatures had started going down, but it wasn't too cold yet. It was really the best time of year for them to be working.

Puck was working, not really paying attention to his surroundings, when he got too hot and pulled his shirt off. He hadn't been paying attention and almost missed the catcalls coming from a group of girls. He glanced over in their direction, flexing his arm more than he had to, and almost fell over from shock. There she was – Rachel. And if the look on her face was any indication she was just as shocked as he.

Puck called out to his boss that he was taking a short break before heading over to the girls, smirk in place. "Well, well…I do believe we have met before."

One of the girls snorted, a petite Asian. "Yeah because that's a real original line."

Puck glanced at her, rolling his eyes. "That's not a line, babe. You'd all know if it was a line." He turned back to Rachel. "It's Rachel, right?"

She nodded. Her face was bright red and she wouldn't quite meet his eyes. "Yeah." Her gaze slid down, taking in his bare chest. "Ummm…N-Noah, right?"

Puck almost laughed out loud at her stuttered. No real surprise that she was distracted by his badass body. What woman wouldn't be? "Close enough." His gaze slid over the other girls. "It's actually Puck. Are you busy?"

"Right. Puck." She shook her head. "I'm not busy. But aren't you?" She shrugged towards where his co-workers were watching him.

He shrugged. "I'm on break. Why don't we go grab a coffee or something?"

"Now?"

Puck laughed. "Yeah now. Like I said, I'm on a break."

Rachel looked at her friends who just shrugged at her. "Sure, I have a little bit of time before my next class. We can grab something from the coffee cart."

He watched as she waved goodbye to her friends and then they were on their way. As they walked Puck knew that there was so much he needed to tell her, to thank her for saving him. "So I just wanted to say, uh, well thank you."

"Thank you? For what?" She looked up at him, curiosity in her eyes.

"Well for pointing out that my life was shit. I never saw it that way and you pointing it out to me, the face that I was worth nothing, well it just got to me ya know?"

"I never said you were worth nothing." Rachel's hand found his and she tugged him to a halt, forcing him to look at her. "I would never say you were worthless, just that your choices in life weren't doing you any good."

He nodded. "It all amounted to the same to me and without you I doubt I would ever have made the change."

"That's nice to hear, but I'm sure that you would have eventually. But since I'm getting the credit I'd like to know how you managed to change things around."

"The night after we'd had our conversation I found an ad for construction workers and even though they didn't make the kind of money I made dealing it was still decent money. So I called and they got me started. A few months after that I moved out of my apartment complex, which was full of hookers, dealers and druggies and got a place just up the road from here. I figured I should have a nice respectable place to go with my nice respectable job." He shrugged. He didn't usually talk about himself so much, but she was looking up at him with those big, innocent eyes and he wanted her to know just how much he had changed. "I'm not dealing anymore obviously and I haven't touched any drugs since that day. I go out for an occasional drink with the guys from work, but it's nothing that serious. And I got rid of Santana. She was a bit of a parasite, always trying to bring me down. She did not like me cleaning up my act one bit."

Rachel laughed. "Yeah I already figured that you weren't seeing Santana anymore."

"Oh?"

"Well she's currently shacked up with Finn, ya know that guy you were bringing drugs to the night of the party? My ex? And apparently they're both using his parents' money on as many drugs as they can get their hands on. I don't know why I'm surprised." Rachel shrgged. "I guess I thought that I knew him better than that. But it just goes to show."

Puck laughed and was just opening his mouth to speak when his phone went off. "Fuck, sorry." He flipped it open without glancing at the caller ID. "Puckerman."

"Puckerman, stop thinking with your dick. You have a job to do so get the fuck back here before I fire your ass." His boss's voice came screaming through the line as he yelled into his own phone.

"Yeah, yeah. Fuck you too Schuester. I'll be back in less than five."

"You'd better be." Without another word his boss hung up the phone, leaving Puck shaking his head.

"Sorry, that was my boss. Apparently my break has been cut short."

Rachel actually looked disappointed, but the look was quickly gone. "Ummm, are you busy tonight? Maybe we can get that cup of coffee then?"

Puck grinned. Holy shit. The little prissy brunette was asking him out. Well fuck him. This had to be the best fucking day of his life. "I'll probably get off at like 7, but I'm free after that."

"Good. Well there's this great coffee shop just up the road. It's called Java Breeze."

"Yeah I know it." He grinned. "It's actually like right across the street from my place."

"Okay, well let's meet there at 8?" Her eyes were questioning, as if she was afraid that he was going to change her mind.

"Absolutely." Puck grinned, leaning over on impulse and grabbed her hand, kissing her palm. "I can't wait." He sent her one more grin before heading back to work, glancing over his shoulder once to see her standing there just staring, shocked.

* * *

Well hell. Was he being stood up? Puck glanced at his watch and groaned. It was already 8:15. He wanted to give her the benefit of doubt; maybe she'd gotten hung up. But how long was he supposed to wait until he was just pathetic? It's not like he could just give her a call since he'd never gotten his number. This kind of shit didn't happen to him. He was Noah Puckerman, self proclaimed badass. He didn't know what the fuck he was supposed to do.

Ten minutes later he was about to give up and head home when she ran through the door. She rushed over to his table, shaking her head.

"I'm so, so sorry. Practice ran over and then I had to go to the dorm to change. I ran all the way here." She said it all in one breathe and he had no idea how she did it, but he thought it was fucking hot. "Thank you for waiting."

"You're lucky, had you not come in the door now I probably would have gone home." Puck smiled at her, gesturing for her to have a seat across from him.

"Well I should get my coffee-"

"No, you just tell me what you want and I'll get it," Puck said, cutting her off.

Rachel looked like she was going to argue, but ended up shrugging and sitting in the chair that he'd indicated. "I'll take a grande slim vanilla latte with extra syrup."

Puck raised his eyebrows at her order, but just shrugged before going to the counter and ordering. When he returned he found her just staring up at him. "See something you like?"

Her face flushed, which only made her more attractive, as she tore her eyes away. "Ummm…sorry."

Puck grabbed her hand, linking their hands together. "Hey not to worry. I know that my hot bod is hard to resist. It's okay to stare."

The comment did just as Puck had intended, cutting through the tension as she burst into giggles. It took her a few minutes to recover, but once she had she just shook her head at him. "Not that you have a high opinion of yourself."

"Not at all. So what practice were you at?"

Rachel shrugged again. "I'm in the college's show choir. It's kind of dorky I know, but I've always dreamed about being on Broadway so I thought that this might be good exposure."

"Show choir huh?"

"'Hey, no making fun of me. It's the first step in my plan to achieve my dream."

"I wasn't planning on making fun of you for the show choir, but for that last statement I just might have to." He grinned at her, enjoying their playful banter.

He'd been afraid that the night would be a bomb. He'd built her up so much in his head that he'd been afraid that she would be nothing like he had thought, but here she was in front of him and so much better than he could have imagined. Now if they could just keep the evening going this way maybe she'd let him take her out again.

Holy fuck, was he thinking about a second date before the first had even finished? What the hell was his deal? He didn't act this way around women. But even as he thought this he knew that there was something different about this girl, something special. He didn't know exactly what it was, but it was what had drawn him to her in the first place. There was just something about her that drew him attention and made it so that he couldn't get her off of his mind.

Suddenly he realized that Rachel had been talking and he had totally spaced out. She was waving her hand in front of his face. "Earth to Noah. Am I boring you?"

"Not at all." He squeezed her hand, the one that he still held in his own. "Actually I was just thinking about you and how you're not like any other girl I know."

Once again her face flushed as she looked away. "I get that a lot."

"That's a good thing." Puck slid his chair around so that he sat closer to her and using his finger he tilted her chin up so that she was forced to look at him. "It's what has kept you on my mind for the last six months."

Rachel just stared up at him for a moment before leaning over and brushing her lips across his.

Holy shit! She had kissed him. Wasn't that supposed to be his job? Wasn't he supposed to initiate the first kiss? Why the fuck did he care? All he should care about was kissing her again, which he did. He leaned over and kissed her more deeply, his tongue brushing against her lips.

His hand slipped into her, keeping her firmly in place as her arms slipped around his neck. Her mouth parted slightly, allowing his tongue to dart inside and brush against hers. He felt her jerk in his arms and pulled back. "You okay?"

She pulled away from him, folding her hands in her lap. "I don't usually make out in public." She glanced around her. "It's embarrassing to think about what other people might be thinking of it."

Puck laughed. "Okay, no problem." He glanced at his watch. "Do you want to come over to my place for a bit? We can watch a movie or something." At her suspicious look he laughed again. "I promise just a movie, nothing else."

Not that he wouldn't like more to happen, but he wasn't about to admit that to her. He didn't want to scare her off, she was already so skittish.

Finally she nodded and they headed back to his place, neither knowing what was actually going to happen or what they wanted to happen.


	5. Chapter 5

_Hello readers! I want to thank you all for reviewing, alerting and adding my story (and me! lol) to your faves. This chapter is smut filled! Just so you know. Sadly the angst is just starting, but hopefully you will all enjoy. Thanks to my beta writtenindreams! And as usual I would LOVE LOVE LOVE you to take the time to review after reading. Enjoy!_

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Puck paused as he unlocked the door, looking over his shoulder at Rachel. "It's not much, just so you know."

Rachel smiled at him, raising her hand to stroke his cheek. "It doesn't matter what it is. It's your first place not associated with your old life."

Puck had to smile at that. She was right. This was the first place that he could really call his own, that hadn't been tainted by the drugs that had ruled his life for so many years. He might not have the money that he'd once had, but with the way she was looking at him, he couldn't help be proud of what he had accomplished. For a girl to be looking up at him with pride – pride in him – in her eyes, it meant so much to him. Probably more than it should.

He couldn't stop himself from leaning over, brushing his lips across hers. He felt her stiffen and quickly pulled back. "I'm sorry."

"No, it's just that, well..." Rachel's face flushed as she looked down. "Well, I just don't have a lot of experience at this."

"With what? Kissing?" He tried to hide the smirk, but couldn't. Nor could he hide the laugh that slipped from him.

"Well that and other things."

She was still refusing to look at him so he slid his hand under her chin and forced her to look at him. "Babe, all I'm trying to do is kiss you. We don't have to do anything else."

She shrugged. "But what if I want to do more?"

For a second Puck couldn't breathe, let alone think as he took in her words. Fuck. Was she saying she wanted to fuck him? He was pretty damn sure that she was. There was no way he'd say no if that was what she was offering.

Instead of answering her, he leaned down and kissed her again, this time taking her a little deeper. He pulled her against his body as his tongue plunged into her mouth. His hands roamed over her back, one hand sliding into her hair as the other slipped under the back of her shirt.

She arched her back, pushing her body more firmly against his and he knew that there was no way she wouldn't be able to tell how hard he was. And he really didn't give a shit. From the way that she was moving against him, she obviously wanted him just as much as he wanted her. Hot damn.

He pulled back, ignoring her protest when his lips left hers and pulled her towards his bedroom. If they were going to do this, there was no way they were going to do it in his hallway. He wanted their first time to be right. Especially if she was inexperienced as she claimed to be.

He sat down on the edge of the bed, pulling her between his legs. She took the lead this time as she leaned down to kiss him. Her hands were under his shirt, yanking at the material and he pulled back long enough to let her pull it over his head before pressing his lips to hers once again. His own hands were under her shirt, stroking the skin of her back.

As they kissed and her hands roamed over his body, he began to unbutton her shirt, his long fingers brushing against her skin with each button. When his hands brushed against her bare stomach, she gasped against his lips and he couldn't help but smile. What Rachel didn't realize was that noises like that turned him on more than most things.

He broke the kiss, ignoring the moan that came from her and ran his lips down her body. His lips skimmed across her breasts that showed in her v-neck shirt, lifted her shirt to kiss her stomach. His hands slid down her sides to her hips and pulled her into his lap so that she was straddling him. He pulled her as close as he could while his lips found hers once again.

For a few minutes, hands slid over bodies while lips brushed, kisses growing deeper with every passing moment. Puck felt like he was going to combust if he didn't get inside of her. Dragging his hand through her hair he tugged, not hard but hard enough that she drew back from him. His lips ran down the column of her neck, nipping over her pulse point causing another gasp to fall from her lips and her hips to grind against his.

His hand slid under her shirt and in a move that he'd done too many times to count, he flicked open her bra one handed. Letting go of her hair he used both hands to push her shirt up and over her head, watching as she removed the bra herself. Damn, she was fucking hot. He felt the desperation building inside of him as he flipped them around so that her back was pressed into the mattress and he was on top of her.

Their lips met again as he ran his fingertips over her breast, loving the feeling of it hardening under his touch. He broke away and leaned down to flick his tongue over her other nipple. With matching motions he worked one nipple with his hand and the other with his mouth. A pinch, a bite, a stroke. Her body bucked against his as he switched his mouth to her other nipple, licking once before blowing on it lightly.

Rachel gasped out as her back arched off of the bed. "Fuck..." Her hands slipped under his shirt, yanking it up.

Puck pulled away long enough to allow her to pull it over his head before returning his attention to her breasts. He gasped against her as her nails dug into his bare back. Yet another turn-on. What about this girl didn't turn him on? Fuck if he could figure it out.

He slid back up her body, lips meeting hers as his hands ran down that hot little body. When he reached the top of her pants he thought that he felt her stiffen, but it was gone in a moment. He traced his fingers just under the waistband, a feather light touch as his tongue slid across hers, and he felt the shiver that ran through her body.

He was doing everything he could to not just rip her clothes off and fuck her until she couldn't remember her name, but she deserved more than that, so he took his time. He flicked the button of her jeans open, pausing for a moment to be sure that there was no hesitation on her part before sliding down the zipper. His fingers dipped inside, rubbing at her through her panties (black fucking lace - how fucking hot was that?). She jerked against his fingers and he could feel how ready she was for him, but he was going to do this right.

He pulled away from her, gripping the side of her pants and pulling them slowly down her legs. His eyes were on hers the entire time and all he could read was desire, desire for him. He tossed the pants onto the floor before kneeling between her legs, his eyes still locked on hers. He blew lightly on the damp panties and watched as she gasped, her hips bucking upwards. With her eyes she begged him to touch her and he damn sure wanted to. He slid the panties down her legs and tossed them over his shoulder. Being sure to keep his eyes locked with hers, he ran a finger down her center, a tease.

"Please..." It was barely audible, but Puck understood what she wanted, and happily obliged.

His finger slid inside of her and he worked just the tip in and out of her before leaning down, breaking their eye contact as his mouth found her. His tongue slid into her center so that he could taste her wet heat as his hand found her clit. His hand and mouth worked in tandem, setting a crazy pace. First he was so fast that he knew that just a few more seconds and she'd be over the edge before slowing down to a pace so slow that she was begging him for more. On and on the cycle went until he thought she might just break away from him and finish herself off.

He slid his tongue in as far as he could, flicking her clit as he did so and then rolling his tongue inside of her. She came in a rush, nails digging into whatever she could reach (his head, shoulders, the bed – it didn't matter what) as she called out his name. He continued to lap at her through the orgasm, feeling the aftershocks as they shot through her. When she lay back on the bed, quiet once more, he moved up her body and kissed her lightly.

"That was...that was awesome." Rachel grinned up at him, eyes glassy before pulling him down for a kiss. While they kissed, her hands snaked between them, undoing his belt and then his pants. Without moments they were both kneeling on the bed naked. "Oh my..." She stared at him in awe as she took in his body.

Well damn if that look didn't make him harder. Was that even possible? Fuck if he knew. He just knew that he wanted her and now. When her hand slid down his chest and grasped him he almost lost it then and there. She slowly worked him in her hand and it felt so good that he just couldn't bring himself to stop her. His eyes slid closed as his head fell back and the breath hissed between his teeth.

Holy fuck! Was that her mouth? Puck's eyes snapped open and when he looked down, he found Rachel working him in and out of her mouth. Motherfucker. She was deep throating him and didn't appear to be having any type of gag reflex problems. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Mom naked. Think of mom naked. He could not come now.

His hands slid into her hair and he pulled her away from him. "Sorry, babe. No can do."

"What?" She looked down. "Was I doing something wrong?"

Puck couldn't help but laugh. "No. That's the problem. You were doing it very, very right and I didn't want to come yet." He kissed her lightly before pushing her back gently on the bed. He covered her body with his before reaching over to his nightstand, pulling out a condom. Within seconds he was covered and poised to enter her. "You're sure about this, right?"

She nodded tightly, legs spread and hands running up and down his back. He didn't need to be told again. He pushed into her, loving the tightness. Too tight. He felt something give and felt her tense below him. Fuck no. Fuck. She couldn't be...

"You're a virgin?"

Rachel's eyes were closed as a tear ran down her cheek. "Well I was. Not so much anymore."

"Fuck." Puck started to pull out, but was stopped by her hand on his back. "What? I know this has got to hurt. We'll stop. This isn't how it should've happened."

"Don't stop. I don't want to." She jerked her hips up, a small whimper escaping her lips and it wasn't one of pain. "This is what I want."

Puck closed his eyes, praying for control. He had to be gentle. She was going to be sore and he wanted to make sure that she was going to enjoy it. Fuck, he wished that he'd known beforehand that she was a virgin. Things would have gone so differently and when he stopped to think about it for a second he wondered if that wasn't why she hadn't told him. If he wanted to fuck someone and was a virgin, he wouldn't tell them either.

Pulling himself back into the moment, he slipped his hand between their bodies, working her clit and watching as she went wild under him while he was still inside of her. She slowly relaxed around him as she grew closer to the edge and that's when he began to move.

He slid out until he was almost out of her, ignoring the whimpering noises that she made before sliding into her again. He didn't want to go too deep until he knew that she was ready, but as he slid into her he knew that she was as ready as she was going to be.

He slid into her until he was as deep inside as he could get, and they both moaned at the sensation. He started with a slow pace, enjoying the feeling of her tightness around him. Because damn was she fucking tight. But she soon began to demand more of him, her hips rising to meet his and her nails digging into his lower back as she tried to encourage him to speed up. And who was he to deny her what she wanted?

He picked up the pace, slamming in and out of her while he tried to keep himself in check. He was going to fucking come before she did and that wasn't what he wanted. He reached between them again, flicking his finger across her clit and sent her spiraling over the edge.

"Noah!" Rachel nails dug into his back as she came.

Puck couldn't take it any longer between her cries, her nails biting into his back and her clenching around him. He slammed into her once more, crying out as he came.

Once he was able to breathe again he rolled over, pulling her into him so that her head lay on his chest. "Are you okay, Rachel?"

She nodded against his chest but it was a moment before she spoke. "That was incredible...I mean it did hurt at first and I'm sure that I'll be sore, but wow."

Puck laughed, grinning down at her as she turned her face towards him. "Well thanks, babe. I do my best." He leaned down to kiss her lightly. "Now c'mon. Let's go get you cleaned up." He stood up, helping her up behind him before leading her into the bathroom. He was going to love showing her all the great ways you can use a bathroom.

* * *

The next morning, Puck woke up to find Rachel standing beside the bed, tears running down her face. When she saw his eyes open she jumped back, bolting from the room. What the fuck? Puck sat up, trying to shake the sleep from his head. Glancing at the clock he saw that it was 7:00. They hadn't gotten to bed until after 3:00 that morning so he knew that it was going to be a tough day with so little sleep, but it had totally been worth it.

He shot out of bed when he heard his front door slam. Shit. He ran to the door, throwing it open to find her already gone. Why had she shot out of there like that? Without saying goodbye. He just didn't understand. He was still trying to wrap his head around what the hell was going on when a scrap of paper on his counter caught his attention.

He picked it up and read it before crumbling up and throwing it onto the ground.

_I'm sorry. This was a mistake._

_Rachel_

That was it. Nothing else. He didn't even have her fucking number. He could not believe that this was happening. He'd thought that last night had pushed them beyond this cat and mouse chase. He'd been her first and she thought it was a fucking mistake? Well fuck her. He didn't need her anyways. He picked up his phone and dialed a familiar number, knowing that the person on the other end could help him forget.


	6. Chapter 6

_Dear readers:_  
_I'd like to apologize for the untimely manner of this update. I didn't realize how long it had been since my last update. Also I hope that you all did not hate me after the last chapter. Please remember that I adore reviews! Thanks to everyone that read, reviewed, alerted and/or favorited that last chapter. I love you all! =)  
_

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Puck sat in his apartment, back against the couch as he leaned back between Santana's legs. He tossed the bag of drugs between his hands as he stared off into space.

"Fuck, Puck! What is your deal today?" Santana's voice was shrill as she snatched the drugs for him. "Do you expect me to just sit here all day while you play with yourself?"

Puck just shook his head, brushing off her words. He really didn't even want her there, but it was better than being by himself. When he was alone, then he would think, and he didn't want to think anymore. He wanted to forget. He wanted to forget how he'd made an ass of himself by thinking that if he cleaned up his act that she would want him.

Rachel. Just the name sent a shooting pain through him. It had been over a week since she'd run out of his apartment and he hadn't seen her since. Not that he'd been looking. He figured that when she ran out of his apartment she'd made her decision, so he wouldn't make it any harder on her by seeking her out. He'd still managed to make it to work every day but in every spare moment, he'd been burying himself in drugs and Santana. He knew that he shouldn't slip back into old habits, but they brought him more comfort than he could find elsewhere.

He watched with disinterest as Santana dumped the coke onto the table, scraping it into semi-neat lines. She quickly sniffed first one and then a second line before tossing him the rolled up dollar bill. Why the fuck not? It wouldn't help him forget but it would help him deal. He leaned down and quickly snorted the two lines that she'd left for him before leaning back onto the couch, his eyes drifting shut.

The couch shifted and soon Santana's lips were on his neck as she straddled him. Her hands slipped under his shirt as she kissed along his neck. Puck knew that she wanted him to touch her but he just couldn't find it in himself to do so. He didn't want her. He hadn't wanted her any time that they'd been together, but she had a way of making him forget that when her hands roamed over his body.

But this time was different. When he didn't respond, she pulled back and the next thing he knew, her hand met with his face. What the fuck? His eyes flew open to meet hers and they were filled with anger. "What the fuck, San?"

"What the fuck? Seriously?" She slammed her first into his chest and he flinched because damn, that had actually hurt. "I've been putting up with your brooding all fucking week, but at least I've been getting fucked. You don't seem to want anything to do with me so why the fuck am I here? Why did you fucking call me?"

Puck shrugged, not meeting her eyes. Why had he called her? What the fuck had he been thinking? Oh wait, he hadn't been thinking. He'd just wanted to forget, but he couldn't tell her that. She'd probably fucking kill him. Santana didn't mind being used, but you didn't use her to forget another girl. She wanted you to only be thinking of her. Not that he could blame her. Who the fuck wanted to fuck someone who was thinking about someone else? He sure as fuck didn't.

"Damn it, Puck!" Santana launched herself from his lap and began to pace the living room. She kicked over some empty bottles that were on the floor as she began speaking in rapid Spanish.

Fuck. Just what he didn't need. A pissed off Santana was never good, especially not when she was high, it just made everything worse. "Look, San, I'm sorry. It's just been a bad week." He paused, not sure what to say next, but just as he was about to try and explain further there was a knock on the door.

Santana's head snapped towards the door. "Who the fuck is coming to see you at ten in the morning, Puck?"

"How the fuck am I supposed to know?" He stood from the couch, pushing her down onto it as he passed. "Just chill the fuck out, all right? And hide that shit." He nodded towards the drugs before heading to the door.

Looking through the peephole, he almost shit his pants when he saw who it was. What the fuck was she doing here? Without conscious thought he unbolted the door and swung it open. And there she was, more gorgeous than he remembered. "What are you doing here, Rachel?"

Rachel looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Look, Noah. Can we talk?" She held up the bag in her hand. "I brought breakfast and coffee."

"Talk about what? Why you fucked me and then took off? Is that what you want to talk about?" His jaw clenched as he watched her visibly flinch. Why the hell was he feeling guilty? She deserved the words, no matter how harshly they were delivered.

Rachel opened her mouth to speak but he saw her eyes focus on something over his shoulder. He glanced back to see Santana standing there in nothing but one of his shirts and a devious smile on her face.

"Well who is this little girl, Noah? She yummy." Santana smirked at Rachel who had grown pale.

"This was a bad idea...obviously," Rachel stuttered as she dropped the coffee and the bag she held, spinning away and running down the hallway.

"Oh did I scare her?" Santana laughed.

Puck shook his head at her. "Get dressed and get the fuck out. I'm done dealing with you." He pulled the door shut and took off after Rachel. He flew down the stairs and as he threw the door open on the first floor, he caught a glimpse of her as she scrambled out the front door of his building.

Ignoring the stares, Puck ran after her, catching up to her just outside the entrance. "Rachel, wait!" He grabbed her wrist and pulled her around to face him. "It's not what you think."

There were tears streaming down her face as she screamed at him, "Oh it's not? You haven't been fucking your ex?"

He shrugged. "Okay, so maybe it is what you think, but you have to let me explain."

"I don't have to let you explain anything. I came over here to apologize and I find you holed up with your ex. You know what that makes me? A fool."

"Now hold on a fucking minute." Puck tried to keep his temper under control, but there was something about this girl that just set him off. "What right do you have to be pissed about this? You ran out on me, not the other fucking way around. I wake up and you're fucking gone. I've heard nothing from you in over a week and you think you have the right to judge me on what I've been doing? Who the hell do you think you are?"

He watched as the fight went out of her, her shoulders hunching as her whole body began to shake, sobs overtaking her. Well, fuck. He hadn't meant for that to happen. He didn't want her to fucking cry. This was bullshit. Why did she keep making him feel like shit when he'd done nothing wrong?

But even as these thoughts ran through his mind, he pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her as she cried. "Shhh, c'mon babe. Don't cry. I can't stand it when girls cry."

Rachel's arms wrapped around his waist as she cried into his chest, but slowly her sobs subsided and she pulled back, looking around them. "They're all staring," she whispered as she buried her head in his chest again.

"That's what happens when two people get into a screaming match on the sidewalk and then one of those two people bursts into tears." Puck ran his hand through her hair gently. "Why don't we go up to my apartment and talk?"

Rachel jerked away from his, disgust on her face. "You want me to go up there with you to _talk_ while _she's_ there?"

Puck shook his head. "Babe, she should be gone by now. I told her to get the fuck out." He shrugged. "The only reason she was there was so that I could try and forget about you."

Rachel looked uncertain for a moment, but then finally nodded. "Fine, but I want you to be sure that she's gone before I set foot in there."

* * *

When they reached the apartment, they found that it had been trashed. Santana had destroyed as much as she could while they'd been outside fighting. "Fuck, dude." Puck sighed as she pushed the door shut behind him. "I should have known that she would pull some shit like this."

Rachel looked around in dismay, her eyes falling to a bag on the floor. "Noah, what is that?"

Puck followed her gaze, quickly stooping to pick it up. "A mistake." He headed down the hallway, and a few moments later the sound of the toilet flushing could be heard.

He came out carrying the empty bag. "I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, Rachel, and I'm sure that I'm going to keep making them. I'm not perfect and I never will be. You either have to accept me the way that I am or leave now."

He watched as the emotions flitted across her face: confusion, betrayal, anger, and finally understanding. Her face softened as she stepped towards him. "I know you're not perfect, Noah. Neither am I." She shook her head. "Which is why I was coming here in the first place. I had to explain what happened and see if I could fix it."

Puck nodded towards the couch. "If you can ignore the mess, we can talk here."

Rachel picked her way around the mess before taking a seat on the couch, perching on the edge as she watched Puck, her eyes wary.

He didn't know what she was going to say, didn't know what she expected of him, but he would give her a chance to explain. She'd let him explain at least in part and she deserved the same. No matter how much it hurt to watch her sitting there in his apartment. Part of him wanted to scream at her while the other part just wanted to take her to bed again. But he did neither of these things. He sank into a chair that sat off to the side so that he could look at her, but not too close that he might scare her off.

They sat there for a few minutes in silence before Puck leaned forward. "Are you going to talk or just sit there?"

Rachel shook her head. "I'm sorry. I just—this is hard, and I honestly do not know where to start." She shrugged as she looked down at her hands. "I've, well, obviously never done this kind of thing before. I've only had one boyfriend from my freshman year in high school until now. I was with him for six years and he knew that I wasn't ready to have sex." She glanced back up at him. "Finn, the guy at the party? That was him. I'm not one hundred percent certain that he stayed faithful, but I couldn't really blame him if he went looking elsewhere for what I wouldn't give him."

"That's bullshit." The words shot out before he could stop them. "Sorry, but that is bullshit. If you weren't ready, you weren't ready. If he didn't respect that then he shouldn't have stayed with you." As he spoke, he saw tears building in her eyes again. "Shit, what did I say about crying?" He slipped over onto the couch beside her, taking her into his arms.

She pulled away from him, wiping the tears from her face. "No, don't be nice to me. Let me finish. Otherwise I'll just fall apart and never get it out."

Puck sighed, rising to go sit in the chair again, but her hand on his arm stopped him. When he glanced down at her, she shook her head and pulled him back down beside her. He slipped his arm around her and she leaned her head against his shoulder before beginning to speak again.

"I didn't know what to think of you, Noah. You were so different from anyone I'd ever known. When I first met you I could see how smart you were and it made me so angry that you were wasting your time by selling drugs. I just couldn't figure out why you would do that. It's just not something that I've ever come into contact with, so I lashed out. Then when I saw you that day on campus and you were working a real job, I was shocked, but I thought it was a sign. I was so drawn to you and there you were, telling me how you'd cleaned up. How could I not go out with you? I didn't plan to sleep with you. I mean, I'd been saving myself for someone special for twenty years, so it never even crossed my mind."

She sat up, looking him in the eyes. "And that's the thing, Noah. You are someone special, which is why I said yes. But when I woke up the next morning, I didn't know what to do so I left. I was freaked out. I was no longer a virgin and I'd slept with a man that I'd been out on one date with. That wasn't me and I didn't know what had come over me. So I left and I stayed away but all I could do was think about you." Her hand rested her hand on his cheek. "I don't know what it is about you, Noah Puckerman, but I can't seem to stay away. I don't want to stay away. Please tell me that I still stand a chance, that you can forgive me for running out."

Instead of answering, Puck leaned down, pressing his lips to hers. The kiss was sweet, just a brush of lips and it left them both wanting more. "Only if you let me do this right. Let me take you out tomorrow night. We'll take it slow."

Rachel smiled up at him and giggled. "All right, but not too slow I hope."

Puck kissed her again, pulling her closer to him. "No, not too slow."


	7. Chapter 7

_I want to thank all of you readers for taking the time to read this. Also for the reviews, alerts & favorites. You guys are awesome. There is some smut in this chapter so you have been warned. Also here comes more drama! Haha. Anyways please review and let me know what you think!_

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Noah Puckerman had a girlfriend. Not just some girl that he fucked and called his girlfriend, but an honest to goodness girlfriend. He still had a hard time understanding how he'd gotten so lucky, but he knew that Rachel Berry was the best damn thing that had ever happened to him.

After all of the drama of their first date and the week that followed, Puck had decided that he was going to do that shit right, treat her like she deserved to be treated. He'd taken her out the next day for dinner and a movie, dropping her back at her dorm with nothing more than a chaste kiss. They'd hung out every night for the next week with nothing more than a few kisses here and there until one day Rachel had lost it on him. He still laughed about it when he thought about that night.

_Puck had pulled away from Rachel as her hands began to pull his shirt up and over her head._

"_Damn it, Noah! What the hell is your problem? You haven't done anything more than kiss me for the last week. What do I have to do to get you to sleep with me?"_

_He hadn't been sure what had shocked him more, the fact that she had cussed at him or that she was asking what she had to do to get him to sleep with her. He hadn't been able to do anything more than stare at her for a moment in shock. "Damn, Berry, that was hot." He'd pulled her to him, hand delving into her hair as their mouths met. _

_They had both been driving each other crazy for the last week so there wasn't much in the way of foreplay needed. Within minutes they were both naked and kneeling on her bed. She'd stared at him in fascination, riveted by his nakedness, even going as far as taking him into her hand. _

_He'd jerked against her body, a moan slipping from his lips, but he'd quickly pulled away. "Not today, babe," he'd whispered against her lips as he'd gently laid her back. "There's no way I could last and I just want to be inside of you. Now."_

"_Oh yes, Noah," she moaned against his lips as her hips jerked up and against him._

_His hand slid between them, running one finger over her center, which tore another moan from her. He delved one finger inside of her, working it slowly before sliding in a second. He couldn't wait any longer before feeling her around him, so he lifted her hips and entered her._

_Their moans had been instantaneous as he filled her completely. Neither of them lasted long, and within moments they were collapsed on the bed, arms and legs entangled._

But now came another first for him: meeting the parents. Rachel had informed him a few days ago that she was heading home for Thanksgiving and that his presence was necessary (her words, not his). And what the fuck was he supposed to say? No? Yeah, that would've gone over really well. So of course he'd agreed and now he was sitting in the passenger seat of her car and heading to her little hometown of Lima. It was a two-hour drive from Columbus, the only place he had ever known and where Rachel attended OSU, or for those who don't pay attention to football, Ohio State University.

"Noah."

He jerked when her hand touched his arm. "Huh?"

"Where is your head?" Rachel grinned, glancing over at him for a second before returning her eyes to the road. "I was talking to you and you weren't responding. Then I had to say your name about five times."

Puck shook his head. "Just thinking about meeting your dads, I guess." He shrugged. "I've never met a girl's parents before."

"Really?"

"Nope, never. I didn't date before you, Rach. So why would I meet someone's parents?"

"That's sad, Noah." She took his hand into hers. "Not to worry. My dads will love you. I've already told them all about you."

"All about me?" He lifted an eyebrow. "Please tell me that you didn't tell them that I was a drug dealer."

Rachel laughed. "Of course I did. I don't keep secrets from them. And they think it's honorable how you've cleaned yourself up."

"Oh, yeah. I'm sure that just makes them love me," he muttered.

"What?"

"Nothing, babe." Puck shook his head as he lifted their entwined hands and kissed the back of her hand. "Nothing at all."

xxx

"Noah, c'mon." Rachel tugged on his hand, trying to drag him out of the car.

"Babe, I changed my mind. This was an awful idea. Just take me back to Columbus, please."

Rachel laughed, shaking her head. "Stop being such a coward."

Puck knew that she was right, but he was scared out of his fucking mind, and honestly he didn't give two shits who knew it. He was about to meet her fucking parents. How had he let her talk her into this? This had to be the worst idea that she'd ever had. They were going to hate him, he just knew it. What was there to like about him? He was a loser and Rachel deserved better. He knew that and knew that they would know it too.

But damn it, that look she was giving him. He had to go in there and he knew that as well. Fuck his life. This shit was going to suck. And he had five days of it. It was the Wednesday before Thanksgiving and they weren't planning on heading back until Sunday. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

"Noah...you're off in your own little world again." Rachel tugged on his hand and this time he climbed out of the car. "Finally."

"Shut up. Let's just get this shit over with."

"You'd better watch your foul mouth. I'm absolutely sure that my dads will not appreciate it."

"I'm sure there's a lot about me that they won't appreciate," he muttered under his breath.

"What was that?"

Puck shook his head. "Nothing, babe. Just talking to myself."

Rachel shot him a look that told him that she'd heard exactly what he said and she didn't approve. Well, hell. She wasn't supposed to have heard that. Fuck it. He straightened his shoulders and took a deep breath as he followed Rachel up the walkway to her childhood home. How bad could it be?

"Rachel!" A short white male with glasses threw open the door and ran towards them, scooping Rachel into his arms. "How is my baby girl doing today?"

"I'm fabulous, Daddy." She pulled away, smiling up at her dad. "Daddy, I'd like you to meet Noah Puckerman. I'd call him Puck though, that's what everyone else calls him," she whispered loudly, shooting Puck a grin. "Noah, this is my Daddy, Matthew."

Puck stood there for a second, frozen in place before sticking his hand out to shake her dad's. "It's nice to meet you, sir."

Matthew laughed. "Sir? Let's dispense with that now. It's Matthew. It's nice to meet you as well, Noah; oh I'm sorry, Puck." He glanced at his daughter. "Why is it that you call him Noah if everyone calls him Puck?"

"Daddy, I've already explained this to you. I just prefer Noah." Rachel slid her hand into Noah's, squeezing it as she tried to reassure him. "Where's Dad?"

"Your dad – David," he added as a side to Puck, "is at the grocery store. We wanted to make dinner for you guys tonight and realized that we didn't have anything that we needed."

Rachel rolled her eyes. "Daddy, you know that you don't have to go to trouble for me when I visit."

"And who said we were going to trouble for you?" Matthew raised an eyebrow at her. "You're not the only one visiting. Now c'mon, let's go inside."

xxx

Puck sat in the kitchen, watching as Rachel and her dads cooked dinner. They were making lasagna, salad, and garlic bread, and it smelled like heaven. But what had shocked him the most was that they had made everything from scratch, even the sauce for the lasagna. His mother had never cooked, let alone cooked something from scratch. And the way they moved around the kitchen, it was obvious that they did this often – or at least had before Rachel went away to school.

And as fucked up as it was, he was jealous. He was jealous of the easy relationship the three had. He also felt completely useless because he didn't know how to cook for shit. But damn if he was going to just sit there like some douche.

"Can I help with something?"

Rachel looked up, a smile on her face and a laugh still in her eyes. She and her dads had been talking about something that he hadn't been keeping up with and it had sent her into peals of laughter. And fuck if he didn't want her right then. Damn, he _really _needed to get his mind off of that thought. That could only lead to bad things happening. Sitting in a room with her dads while he was thinking about fucking their daughter. Yeah, not a good idea.

"Sure, Noah. You can make the salad." She carried over a head of lettuce, tomatoes, cheese, carrots, and croutons. "Just be sure to shred the lettuce into kind of small pieces. We don't want anyone choking." She patted his hand lightly before turning away.

It wasn't much, but he made the damn salad and he did pretty damn good, or at least he thought he did. Soon after, they were seated at the table and Puck had to admit that this was the best meal he'd had in a long time.

"So Puck," David started, "what is it you do again? Rachel's told us but I don't recall."

Puck shrugged. "I work construction. My boss has really been showing me the ropes and I like it."

"Don't be modest, Noah." She grinned at her dads. "He's about to be promoted. He's going to be a supervisor over people who have been doing this a lot longer than him."

"That's awesome." Matthew smiled at him. "Much better than dealing drugs."

Puck, who had just taken a bite of lasagna, began to choke on his food and Matthew leaned over and thumped him on the back. Rachel had told him that she'd told her dads, but he hadn't been one hundred percent sure that she'd been telling the truth. And who the fuck brought that kind of shit up at dinner? He had no fucking clue what he was supposed to say in response. "Ummm...yeah..."

Matthew laughed. "There's no need to be embarrassed, son. Sometimes you do what you have to do to get by. I think it's outstanding that you've turned your life around. It's an accomplishment that you should be proud of. I know Rachel is proud of you. And honestly, although it won't mean much coming from me since you barely know me, I'm proud of you too."

Puck was once again shocked into silence. Was her dad really saying that he approved of him? Because that's sure as hell what it sounded like to him. And no matter what Matthew said, Puck couldn't help but feel a sense of pride at his being proud of him. No one had ever said that they were proud of him before.

One thing was for sure. This visit was not turning out at all like he'd expected. He'd expected to be looked down on; to be told that he wasn't good enough. And now he could see that was because he didn't think he was good enough for her. He didn't think he deserved someone like her. Well, fuck. When had he turned into such a pussy? He was Noah fucking Puckerman. He could have any girl that he wanted.

But as he glanced over at Rachel, he knew that she understood. When her hand wrapped around his, he sent up a prayer for whomever had sent him this wonderful girl.

"Thank you, Matthew, it actually means a lot to me to hear you say that."

And with that the conversation was over and flowed to easier things. Puck couldn't believe his luck, not just with Rachel but with her dads. He was a lucky son of a bitch (literally).

Xxx

"I still can't believe that your dads let us share a room."

Rachel shrugged as she slid her jeans down her legs. "They know that I'm an adult and that I have a sex life. I'm sure that they thought I was sleeping with Finn since I was dating him for six years."

"Ugh, please don't mention that douche." Puck watched in fascination as she pulled her shirt over her head and reached back to undo her bra. She turned before he could see anything but when she glanced over her shoulder at him he almost lost his shit. "Damn, Rach. Can't you change in the bathroom or something. You're going to drive me crazy."

Rachel grabbed one of his shirts and pulled it over her head before she turned towards him again. "Whatever do you mean?" The grin she wore was wicked as she walked towards him.

"Nuh uh, Berry. We are _not_ doing it with your dads just down the hall." Puck sat up on the bed, scooting back farther (as if that would stop her).

"Once again, Noah, they know that I have a sex life." Rachel had reached the edge of the bed by this point and was crawling towards him.

He knew he was a fucking goner. How the hell could he really tell her no? Fuck his life. He was going to fuck her with her dads within hearing distance. He was so fucked.

When she reached the spot where he sat she straddled his lap, her lips brushing lightly against his. "What's wrong? Don't you want me?"

Puck thought his eyes were going to roll back into his head when she ground her hips against him. Damn she so knew which buttons to push. "Of course I fucking want you." He slid his hands down to her hips, urging her in her movements as he deepened the kiss.

Suddenly the blaring of his phone made them jerk apart. Who the fuck was calling him? He was going to fucking kill whoever it was. "Sorry, babe. I'd better see who it is." He sighed with regret as she climbed off of his lap and he leaned over to grab the phone.

Holy shit. There was no way she was calling him. Why the fuck would she be calling him? He flipped open the phone quickly. "What?"

"Puck, I'm in trouble and I need you."


	8. Chapter 8

_Sorry about the lack of update. I forget to post and it makes me a bad person, but I'm thankful to all of you readers for your reviews (these make me the happiest), favorites and alerts. You guys are awesome and without you I'd have no reason to be writing. For my reviews, yes you were correct at your guesses. Yay! For the rest of you, let me know if I was at all surprising. Thanks!_

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"Noah, you have to slow down."

Puck glanced at the speedometer, which read that he was doing almost 100. Fuck, Rachel was right. He did need to slow down. Especially since he was driving her car. They didn't need to get into an accident. That would defeat the whole purpose of his hurrying.

"I'm sure that she's okay." Rachel's voice was quiet as she laid a hand on his arm.

"How do you fucking know that?" Puck snarled at her. One glance at her face had him instantly regretting it. It wasn't Rachel's fault. No, he knew exactly where the blame lay – his mother and him. "I'm sorry, babe. It's just...Fuck, I just can't believe that I left her there like that and now this shit happened."

Rachel sat there silently for a moment before sighing. "I know you said that you didn't want to talk about it, but do you want to tell me what happened now?"

Puck sighed. He really didn't want to talk about this shit, but she had every right to know why he'd insisted that they leave her dads' house in the middle of the night. The only thing that he'd told her was that his sister needed him.

He hadn't seen his fifteen-year-old sister in months, not since he'd given up dealing. She still hung with that crowd and it had never occurred to him to take her with him when he'd left. And now this shit happened. Fuck his life. The guilt was eating him up inside.

"I've never told you about how I grew up, Rach, because it's not pretty. But let's just say that my mother likes her men and her booze more than she likes her kids. She kicked me out when I was sixteen because I'd beat the shit out of the guy she was seeing. Abby, she's my kid sister, was ten at the time. I figured she'd be okay there with Mom, but apparently not."

Rachel took his hand into hers, squeezing. "It's ok, Noah. This isn't your fault."

The breath hissed between his teeth. "Yes it is. You don't even know what the fuck happened. My mom's boyfriend beat the shit out her and then my mom blamed her. She kicked my sister out because her fucking boyfriend beat the shit out of her kid. I shouldn't have left her there alone. This never would've happened."

"You don't know that." Rachel paused. "But now maybe you can remedy that."

"What are you talking about?"

"Why don't you bring Abby home with you? Have her stay with you. Help her get her life together like you got yours together. She's what? Fifteen now? It's not too late."

It's not too late. God he hoped it wasn't too late. And now that he thought about it, Rachel had a good point. Why didn't he bring his little sister home with him? There was no way he was going to let her go back to their mom's. This time it was getting hit, but next time it could be something worse, something much worse, and he wasn't going to let that shit happen to his baby sister. No fucking way in hell.

Xxx

"Where the fuck is she?" Puck scanned the crowd, trying to catch a glimpse of his sister. All she'd given him was an address, and when they'd shown up they found a party raging on even though it was well after three in the morning. Not that he'd never been out partying till dawn, but they weren't even trying to be quiet. He wouldn't be surprised if the cops were called and he sure as hell didn't want to be there if they showed up.

Rachel squeezed his hand, trying to get him to calm down. "Try her cell again, Noah."

Puck flipped open his phone and quickly punched a few buttons until it was dialing his sister. He'd been calling her for the last half hour to no avail.

"Hello?"

"Abby, thank fucking God. Where the hell are you? We're here." Puck met Rachel's eyes, his filled with relief.

"I'm out back. I'll come in—"

"No, we'll come out back and find you."

"We?"

Puck didn't bother responding, snapping his phone shut and dragging Rachel through the crowd. Once they hit the door, he shoved it open and found his sister huddled on a chair hidden in the shadows. "Abby..."

Abby looked up at him, tears streaming down her face and gave him a clear view of it. She was a mess. One of her eyes was black and there were bruises and scrapes all over her face. She jumped out of the chair and threw herself into Puck's arms, sobs wracking her body.

"It's okay, Abby. It's gonna be okay." Puck's eyes met Rachel's over Abby's shoulder and there was murder in them. He saw her flinch and knew that what he was feeling was all over his face. He had to get that shit under control real quick. He pulled his sister closer, trying not to press anywhere too much as it appeared that her entire body was covered in bruises.

He could kill someone, like for real. The rage that filled him was threatening to bubble over and the only thing that was keeping him together was Rachel's hand on his arm and the feel of his baby sister in his arms. Losing it wouldn't do either one of them any good.

He pulled back from his sister slightly so that he could look at her. "It's bad, isn't it, Abby?" At her nod he had to bite his tongue, to stop and think about what he was going to say before he said it. "I think we need to bring you to the hospital."

"No!" she shrieked, trying to shove away from him. "If we go there they'll have to report it and I'll end up in foster care. I don't want to end up in a group home, Noah. I won't."

Puck pulled her into his arms, gently running a hand over her hair. "Shhh, it's ok. But you're coming home with me. There's no fucking way that I'm going to let you go back to Mom's. Fucking bitch."

Abby nodded slowly, her tears slowing. She pulled away slowly and finally noticed Rachel. "Who's the broad?"

"Abigail Delilah Puckerman!" Noah roared. "She is _not_ a broad and you will not refer to her as anything besides Rachel." He glanced up at Rachel, a ghost of a smile on his lips. "And she's my girlfriend."

xxx

Within the hour they were back at Noah's apartment with Abby in his bed (it was only for the fucking night. He couldn't let his sister who'd had the shit beat out of her sleep on the couch. He wasn't that big of a douche.) while he and Rachel sat on the couch talking quietly.

"I know that I was the one who suggested it, but Noah, you do know how hard it's going to be trying to keep her under control don't you?" Rachel sighed as she curled into him, lying her head on his chest.

"Yeah I know, but I just – I owe her, ya know?" Puck closed his eyes, enjoying the feel of her in his arms. "I don't know how the fuck it's going to work, but I owe it to her to try. She's the only family that I have left."

Rachel nodded. "It's sweet of you to want to take her in, but if your mother wants to, she can make it hard on you since your sister is a minor."

"Yeah? Let her try that shit. Why the fuck do you think I had you take the pictures of Abby?" Puck closed his eyes again, trying to fight against the anger that was threatening to overtake him.

When they'd gotten back to his apartment, he'd sent Abby and Rachel into his room so that she could take pictures of the bruises. He'd seen a few of the pictures and it had ended with him throwing his glass across the room. She had bruises everywhere, and he meant _everywhere_. On her arms, legs, ribs, back, hips. There was more skin bruised than not. He didn't think that this was the first time this douche had beat her, but it had apparently been the last straw.

He hadn't really been able to get Abby to talk to him, to tell him what all had gone down but he knew that he just needed to give her time. Maybe she'd talk to him soon. All he wanted to do was help her.

And it was that one thought that caused him to pause. He had spoken to his sister at least once a week since their mother had kicked him out, but it had never occurred to him to help her. And why not? Because he'd been a selfish bastard who cared about no one but himself. As much as he hated to admit it, he knew it was true. Until Rachel.

She had turned him and his life around. If it wasn't for this girl who made him feel for the first time that he deserved more, that he was better than the life he'd been leading, he didn't think that he would have been able to come to his sister's rescue. No matter how much he loved her, he didn't think the old Puck would have helped her, or even cared to help her.

And that thought scared the shit out of him. Was it possible for him to make up for the way that he'd been? Would he really be able to redeem himself? He just didn't know. Glancing down at the beautiful girl in his arms, he hoped like hell that he could. He'd do anything to be good enough for her.

As if she could feel his eyes on her, Rachel suddenly lifted her head to look at him. "What are you thinking about?"

"Nothing, babe." He sighed. "Why don't I walk you back to your dorm so that you can get some sleep?"

xxx

His sister had been living with him for a few weeks and so far things were going well enough, although they were far from perfect. He'd gotten a twin bed and some wall partitions so that he could set her up a room in the living room, something that would be just hers. There wasn't much room there anymore with half of it set up as her bedroom and the other half filled with his furniture, but they dealt with it. Abby was going to school on a mostly regular basis. He knew that he couldn't force her to go, so he tried his best to get her there, and for the most part she did.

Rachel was a huge help with convincing her that school was a good thing, no matter how boring it was. Rachel had pretty much moved in with them as well, spending all of her nights there and most of her days. She understood parts of Abby that he just couldn't and between the two of them, they were helping her to get better. He'd gotten her to go to a support group and it seemed to be helping.

Life was good and every once in awhile he'd find himself waiting for the other shoe to drop. Life couldn't be this good, not for him. He'd even said as much to Rachel one day, and she'd rode his ass hardcore for that shit.

"_Do you ever wonder what's going to go wrong next?" he asked her one night while they lay in bed, sated from a long night of mind-blowing sex._

"_What are you talking about?"_

"_Life is too good, babe. It makes me wonder when something is going to go wrong."_

_She'd sat up in the bed to look at him, anger flashing in her eyes. "You can't go around waiting for bad things to happen. Things are going good in your life and you wonder when something is going to go wrong? What is wrong with you? You should be enjoying your life, not worrying about what might go wrong."_

"_Jesus, Berry. It was just a question. No need to bite my fucking head off."_

"_Well if you're going to act like an imbecile, then I'm going to treat you like one."_

"_An imbecile?" Puck laughed. "Did you really just call me an imbecile?"_

_Rachel crossed her arms over her chest, pouting. "Well you obviously are, and if you're going to mock me, then I'm going back to my dorm." _

_She'd actually started to climb out of the bed, but his arm snaked out and pulled her back into the bed. He was on her in seconds, her body pressed under his. "I don't think so, babe." He kissed her and her body went pliant against his. "I have other plans for tonight." He kissed her again. "I love you, babe, and I'm going to spend the rest of the night showing you how much."_

_And boy did he. They spent the rest of the night with him showing her just how much he loved her. It wasn't until he woke up the next day after a mere two hours of sleep that he realized he'd told her he loved her._

He never mentioned his worries over something going wrong to fuck things up again because he knew how much it bothered her.

The ringing of his phone broke him from his thoughts and he quickly grabbed it. Too bad he didn't realize that the other shoe was about to drop.


	9. Chapter 9

_Hello readers! Another chapter for your reading pleasure. The story is drawing to a close - just a few more chapters. Thank you again for your reviews, alerts and favorites. Please leave a review if you please as they make me smile. Lol. thanks!_

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Puck threw his phone across the room before slamming his fist into the wall. He'd fucking called it. He'd just gotten comfortable in his new life and now this shit. Fuck his life. Why did this shit happen to him? Why the hell couldn't he get a damn break?

A key in the lock was the only warning he got before Rachel and Abby spilled into the apartment, talking a mile a minute. One look at him was all it took for Rachel to sober up. "What's wrong, Noah?"

"Fuck," was all he said before turning and heading into his room. How the hell was he supposed to explain the phone call to her?

"_Dude, I'm in trouble."_

"_Matt? What the fuck, man?" Puck was so shocked to hear from Matt that he didn't really register what his best friend had said. They hadn't really talked much since Puck had decided to go straight. Matt couldn't understand why he was giving up the life and Puck couldn't understand why Matt couldn't give it up. So they'd just stopped talking._

"_Fuck, dude." Fear tinged Matt's voice. "I'm in so much trouble and I don't know what to fucking do."_

_Well, fuck. "Okay, well, tell me what the fuck is going on and we'll go from there."_

"_Well, I've been selling drugs for Sue again since her shit is the best and it's the easiest to sell." He paused. "But I got fucking mugged and they stole all of my shit. Mike Chang, you remember him don't you? Well he's working as Sue's enforcer/bodyguard now and he paid me a visit. Told me that I have until midnight tonight to come up with the money. That was this fucking morning at ten a.m. I don't have that kind of money, Puck. She'll have him fucking kill me."_

"_Shit, dude. How much do you have to give her?" Puck ran a hand over his head, trying to figure out how to help his friend. There was one thing that you didn't do and that was fuck with Sue Sylvester and her money. Matt was fucking screwed if he didn't come up with the money._

"_100k."_

"_Are you fucking kidding me? I don't have that kind of money either, douche. Fuck." Puck kicked the coffee table in front of him, sending a glass flying into the wall where it shattered._

"_I know, man. I just didn't know who else to go to."_

"_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck." Puck shut his eyes, shaking his head. "I'll figure something out. I'll get back to you." He closed the phone without another word before throwing it across the room._

"Noah!" Rachel was pounding on the bedroom door.

He couldn't fucking deal with her right now. He still didn't know what the fuck he was going to do. Well, he kind of did. He was going to have to go talk to Sue and that was not going to be fun or go over well, he was sure of that. And what the fuck was he supposed to tell Rachel? He didn't want to fucking lie to her.

"Noah, if you don't let me in right this instant I'm gonna have Abby pick the locks."

Puck had to laugh at that. He knew that his baby sister could do it, too. He opened the door with a shake of his head. "Kid, you stay out there." He pulled Rachel into the room, but slammed the door in his sister's face.

"That was extremely rude, Noah."

"I don't give a shit about being rude right now, babe. I've got bigger problems."

Rachel grabbed his arm, pulling on it until he faced her. "You're scaring me. What is going on?"

"It's my best friend Matt. He's in a shitload of trouble and I'm the only one who can help him out." Puck sighed as he sat down on the edge of the bed and closed his eyes. He felt the bed move a little as Rachel sat beside him.

"What kind of trouble? And how can you help him?"

Keeping his eyes closed he pulled her to him. "He lost a shipment of drugs that he was supposed to be selling. And the person that he was selling for? Not exactly the nicest person. She sent someone over to tell him that he had until midnight to come up with 100k."

"Oh my God," she gasped. "But I'm still confused on what you can do to help."

He finally opened his eyes, meeting hers. "I'm going to have to go talk to the supplier and see if I can work out some kind of deal. She won't talk to him, but she'll talk to me."

"No!" Rachel's hand flew to her mouth. "You can't go back there, Noah! You've been doing so well."

"Babe, it's not like I'm going to start dealing just because I go down there. I'm just doing a favor for a friend."

"Yeah, a favor that could get you killed." Rachel began pacing the floor. "I'm going with you."

"The fuck you are!"

"Well, if it's safe enough for you, why isn't it safe enough for me?"

"Because I grew up in that life. They'd eat you alive, Berry."

"Screw you, Puckerman! I can take care of my damn self."

Well holy shit. Rachel Berry had just cussed at him. If the situation hadn't been so serious, he might have laughed. But this was definitely not a laughing matter. He couldn't believe that she would suggest such a ridiculous idea.

"Baby, I know that you can take care of yourself, but not with this." He stepped over to her, running a hand down her cheek. "Not this, it's not safe for you."

"But it's safe enough for you?" She jerked back, her voice raising an octave as she screamed at him. "I will not let you do this, Noah Puckerman. I won't!"

Puck shook his head sadly. "I'm going, Rachel. There's nothing that you can do to stop me. I'm sorry." He kissed her forehead before heading into his closet where he pulled out a lockbox that held his gun.

When Rachel saw the gun she broke down, tears running down her face and sobs wracking her body. "Please, Noah. Don't do this. I can't – if something happens to you – I can't deal with it."

Puck shook his head at her. "I love you, Rachel." He turned from the room, trying to ignore her tears and the pain in his chest.

When he heard a faint, "I love you, too..." he almost smiled, but he couldn't quite bring himself to.

As he headed to the door he passed his sister who sat on the couch, her face pale as tears streamed down her face. "Be careful, Noah. Please."

Puck nodded. "Keep an eye on her," he said, jerking his head towards the bedroom where he had left Rachel. "She's really freaking out." He waited for his sister's nod before heading out the door, tucking the gun into waistband of his jeans at the small of his back. He just wanted to get this shit over with.

* * *

Puck stood in front of the building trying to figure out how the hell to approach this. He'd been out of the game too long. He didn't know what the fuck was going on. Shit, why was he here? And then he remembered – because he promised his best friend that he'd take care of it.

"Puck?" A voice called from behind him.

He spun around to find Mike Chang standing there. Fucking douche. The guy had ran with them for years but now apparently he was Sue's bitch. If it weren't for the fact that he needed this meeting to go well, he would've punched the motherfucker in the face.

"Chang, my man. I'd heard that you were working for Sue now." He nodded towards the building.

"Yeah, I am." Mike grinned. "Are you trying to get back in?"

"Nah, man. I just need to talk to Sue. Think you can arrange it?"

Mike shrugged. "Sure, why not? Wait here, I'll see what I can do."

Thirty minutes later, he was sitting in front of Sue, Mike standing off to the side.

"So Mr. Puckerman," Sue didn't bother to look up as she spoke to him, "what is it that I can do for you today?"

Puck steeled himself. He knew that this wasn't going to be easy, but he had to get his friend off the hook somehow. "It's about Matt Rutherford."

Sue did look up at him then, looking over the top of her glasses as she stared at him. "What about him?"

"I know that he owes you some money. I was hoping that we could work out some kind of arrangement."

"Interesting." She took off her glasses before crossing her arms over her chest. "Why is it that you're here and Mr. Rutherford isn't?"

"I'm assuming it's because he thinks you'll kill him if he doesn't show up with your money."

"It's a good assumption. Because I would. Kill him I mean." Sue leaned back in her chair. "So are you going to pay me?"

Puck shook his head. "I don't have that kind of money either."

"Well then, I guess that means that you're going to have to work for me to pay off the debt." Sue looked like she was about to say something more when a noise sounded from the hallway. "Chang, check that out."

Puck watched as Mike stepped into the hallway, calling out as he did so, "Who's there?"

He jumped when he heard the gun go off and was out of his seat before he even realized it. He ran to the door to see Mike standing over a girl's body. A girl's body that looked familiar. Fuck. Shit.

Puck crossed the hallway and slid to his knees, pushing the hair from her eyes. Fuck, it was her. Rachel. How the fuck had she ended up here? Panic began to build within him as he saw the blood gushing from her stomach, staining the white shirt that she wore.

"God, Rachel. What did you do?" Puck pulled her to his body, reaching behind him to pull out his own gun. In seconds he has it pointed at Mike who had been staring dumbfounded at Rachel. "We're leaving. Do not try and stop us." He picked her up, doing his best to hold the gun steady but honestly if he ended up shooting he was most likely going to hit him in the leg. But who the fuck cared as long as he got them the fuck out of there?

He backed up slowly, never taking his eyes off of Chang. Once he felt the door at his back he pushed it open, sliding the gun back into the waistband of his pants. As he headed down the street he was pulling his cell phone from his pocket.

"_911, what's your emergency?"_

"My girlfriend's been shot. She's losing so much blood." Puck knew that he was blabbering and in some back part of his mind he couldn't help but compare himself at that moment to how Rachel was all the time.

"_Sir, I need you to calm down. Where are you?"_ Puck quickly told the operator where he was (he'd gone down the road a few blocks so that the shooting couldn't be linked with Sue Sylvester). "_We'll have someone there shortly. Would you like me to remain on the line?"_

"No I don't want you to fucking remain on the line. I want you to get fucking help for my girlfriend." He slammed the phone shut. He slid to the ground, cradling Rachel to him. Her blood was everywhere, all over him and all over her. Finally the tears came, sliding down his cheeks as he began to shake "Damn it, Rach. Wake up." Why wouldn't she open her eyes? Was she even still breathing? Damn it, he had no idea. He buried his head in her hair and just cried, feeling like his heart had been ripped from his chest.


	10. Chapter 10

_Dude, I am sooooo sorry. Between Christmas and my flu I've completely forgot about updating. Terrible me. But here's an update. Love you guys! Please remember to read and review. I really do love you all! Happy New Years!_

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Fuck. Fuck. Puck paced the waiting room, hands shaking and mind racing. He couldn't seem to get his shit together. But no matter where his thoughts wandered to they ended up back on the same one thought. He could've gotten Rachel killed. How the hell could he have gotten her wrapped up in this shit?

The ambulance had arrived within minutes, driving both him and Rachel to the hospital. They had immediately whisked her away, telling him that he had to wait in the waiting room. He'd about driven himself crazy with worry in the twenty minutes that it had taken for a doctor to come out and talk to him. She was stable enough for surgery, so they were going to take her up and start. The doctor explained that there were no guarantees – there never were with gunshot victims, but that he would do his very best to save her.

Puck had thanked the man, but had promptly exited the hospital and slammed his fist into the wall. He had so much pent up anger and no way to let it out. It was with shaking hands that he had called his sister and told her what had happened, asking her to get a cab to the hospital.

Now he was waiting for her to get there because he had shit that he had to take care of. He threw himself into one of the chairs, burying his face in his hands. He fought against the tears that threatened to fall whenever he sat still for any period of time. He was acting like a little fucking girl, but what the fuck would he do if she died? He fucking loved her (and there was nothing fucking wrong with that, even if it was the first damn time in his life that he had loved anyone besides his sister) and he wasn't sure that he could live without her.

He had just resumed his pacing when he heard his name being called.

"Noah!" The weight of his sister slamming into him almost caused him to fall over, but he quickly wrapped his arms around her and hugged her tightly. When she pulled away it was only slightly, and she kept her arms wrapped around his waist. Her face was tear streaked, her eyes rimmed in red and he knew that he wasn't the only one worried. "What happened?"

"She fucking followed me." He paused. "Why the fuck didn't you keep her there? I told you not to let her follow me!" He didn't mean to yell at her but he was so angry and she was the first available target.

"I know, Noah!" Abby cried as she turned away from him, her body wracked with sobs as she leaned against the window. "I never thought that she'd actually follow you. I just went to the bathroom. God, it's all my fault."

Well fuck, he was an ass. "Abby, I'm sorry." He turned her around to face him. "This is in no way your fault. The only one to blame for this is me, for bringing this shit into her life." He shook his head. "I knew she was too fucking good for me. I don't know why I ever thought that my past wouldn't catch up with me. I never should've put her in the position for this to happen."

Abby wiped the tears from her face. "It's not your fault. Whoever pulled the trigger is to blame."

And that one sentence filled him with anger once again. She was right. Mike was to blame and he was going to fucking kill him. Puck pulled away from his sister. "I need you to stay here. I've got some shit to take care of."

Abby's face was terror filled as she grabbed his arm. "Noah, you can't leave. You need to stay and wait for Rachel to come out of surgery."

"That's what you're here for." Noah jerked his arm from her grip and started for the door.

"No!" Abby threw herself in front of him, pushing against his chest as if to stop him. "You can't go out and do something stupid. You could end up getting yourself shot, and then what? Then what will I do?" The tears were once against streaming down her face. "Go back to Mom's? That's fucking great! Can't you think of anyone but yourself?"

"Can't you?" His eyes flashed. "All I hear in that is what will you do?"

"Well so what. I'm fifteen, what do you expect?"

"Abby, move." Puck almost growled at her when she shook her head. "I can move you or you can move yourself, but either way I'm leaving."

She continued to stand there for another moment, the tears still streaming down her face before looking down and stepping aside. He was almost out the door when he heard her call out to him, "Just be careful, Noah. Don't die."

Puck closed his eyes, fighting tears again. He'd never been one for tears – he could count the number of times he'd cried on one hand, but he felt like his entire world had been spun on its axis. He didn't know which way was up. But he did know that he loved his sister and he was grateful to her for showing that she cared in her own way. He almost stopped and went back to her (because she was right, he could die) but he knew that if he did he would never do what needed to be done.

So he straightened his shoulders and hurried to the exit as her words swirled in his head.

Xxx

It wasn't hard to find them, they weren't trying to hide. Why would they? They didn't think anything could touch them, but Puck was about to show them differently.

They were in a private room of a restaurant that Sue owned when he walked in, gun drawn. Mike started to jump up but when Puck leveled the gun at him he stopped what he was doing.

"Yeah, don't even think about it. You'll both be dead before you can get a shot off, Chang."

"And you'd be dead before we hit the floor," Sue replied coolly.

"Maybe, but it would be fucking worth it." Puck snorted. "But I'm not here to fucking kill you. I have something to live for, I don't have a death wish."

"You could've fooled me there, Mr. Puckerman, showing up here with a gun pointed at me and my man." Sue tilted her head as she looked at him. "Sounds like a death wish to me."

Puck shook his head. "I don't want to use it. I only have it to make a point." His eyes were on Sue but the gun was still pointed at Mike. "I want to show you how easy it is for me to get to you."

"Point taken, but why?"

"Your _man_ here shot my girlfriend today and she could die. He needs to pay for that." Puck paused, his angry eyes flashing to Mike who flinched from his gaze. He knew the man saw his death in his eyes. "I want none of you to come near me, my girlfriend, or Matt Rutherford ever again. Or I will end you, Sue, even if it means my own death."

Sue shrugged. "If you want that, then you better get yourself and Mr. Rutherford out of the business and away from my part of town and not come back because I do not take kindly onto people losing my stuff _or_ pulling a gun on me." She paused. "But I do appreciate the balls that it took for you to do so. Because of that I will allow you five minutes alone with Mr. Chang here and then I will allow you to leave here unharmed. But you'd better be out of this town as soon as you can."

Puck looked on in shock before pulling it together. "Now?"

Sue nodded. "No one will come in unless I call them, so have at it." She leaned back in her chair while Mike looked at her in shock. "What? You shot an innocent girl who happened to be his girlfriend. Someone needs to beat the shit out of you."

Puck didn't have to be told twice. He tossed the gun onto a table before launching himself across the room, his fist catching Mike's jaw and sending him flying back into the wall. He was on him in seconds, fists flying so fast that the other man couldn't even begin to defend himself. He slammed his fist anywhere that he could: Mike's face, stomach. It didn't matter where as long as he was causing him pain.

He needed to pay. Really he needed to die, but there was no way he was going to chance prison or death for this douche. So he just kept swinging even when his hands were stinging with the pain; he just kept going. He just kept going until he heard Sue's voice call out to him, "Okay, that's enough."

Puck swung one last time before spitting in the other man's face. Not that Mike could see what the fuck was going on with both of his eyes almost completely closed; both his nose and lip were bleeding and Puck knew that there was more damage under the clothes that the man wore. "You're a fucking douche and one day you'll get what's coming to you." He turned, nodding to Sue before grabbing his gun and getting the fuck out of there before she changed her mind.

Xxx

"Hey P—" Matt's words were cut off when Puck's fist made contact with his face. Matt's hands flew up to his face, feeling blood from where Puck had gotten his nose. "What the fuck, man? I think you just broke my fucking nose."

Puck was still seething with anger and as soon as Matt had opened the door, he hadn't even thought about what he was doing, he just swung. Not that he felt bad about it. Honestly? He wanted to kick his fucking ass, but that would solve nothing.

"My fucking girlfriend got shot because of your dumb ass." Puck shoved past him and into his friend's apartment. "You need to pack up your shit. Like now."

"Hold up, man. You lost me. How the fuck did I cause your girlfriend to get shot?"

Puck spun around to face him, shaking his head. "I went down to talk to Sue about wiping out your debt and apparently Rachel followed me." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath. "Fucking Chang shot her."

Matt's eyes were wide, his nose forgotten. "Is she okay?"

"I don't fucking know, man. She was in surgery when I left the hospital. I went back to see Sue and Chang. Sue has agreed to let go of the debt as long as we all get the fuck out of her side of town and stay the fuck away. And you, you have to stop selling drugs." He held up his hand when the other man started to talk. "This is non-negotiable. I will turn your ass over to Sue and let her kill you if you don't get the fuck out of the life. You can stay with me, it'll be tight since my sister is there too, but we'll make it work and I'll get you a job on the construction crew." He paused again. "If you don't think you can do it, then tell me now because I will cart your ass off to Sue now."

"Fuck, man." Matt finally shut the door, leaning his head against it for a moment before turning back to Puck. "You want me to just give this up? Give up the money and go to working a regular job?"

"Yeah, I do. Because otherwise you're dead. Even if you leave town and do this somewhere else, you'll still end up getting fucking killed because that's what this life does to you." Puck laid his hand on Matt's shoulder, shaking him. "Don't you get it? This is no way to live your life. And I won't be friends with someone who doesn't value their own life."

"We've been friends since we were five and you'd throw that all away?"

Puck shook his head. "It wouldn't be me throwing it away. I told you what you needed to do. Not just to keep me in your life, but to stay fucking alive. That's what I'm trying to get you to understand. You're going to die if you don't get out."

Matt looked away before nodding. "Fine. I'll do it."

"Good. Now let's hurry the fuck up. Only bring what you absolutely need because I'm pretty sure that Sue is going to be sending someone over here soon. Plus, I need to get to the hospital to find out what's going on with Rachel."

Matt snorted. "Just what I need. To see fucking Chang."

It was Puck's turn to snort. "Chang won't be going anywhere for awhile." He glanced up when he felt his friend watching him. "He fucking shot my girlfriend so I beat the living shit out of him."

Matt laughed, shaking his head. "Well at least some things never change."


	11. Chapter 11

**_A/N - I'm so sorry about the lack of update so close to the end, but real life gets in the way sometimes. There is only this chapter and then the epilogue so I hope that you've enjoyed reading so far. I will update with the epilogue in a few days. Promise! Please read and review!_**

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Puck stood outside of Rachel's room, shaking hands clutching flowers. He was so afraid to open the door. He knew that she had made it out of surgery. He'd hunted down her doctor and made her tell him what had happened, how she was and what her chances were.

Rachel had been shot in her abdomen and it had caused damage to her uterus. They'd done everything that they could, but they didn't know if she'd ever be able to have kids. And it was all his fault. She'd lost a lot of blood and the last the doctor knew she hadn't woken up, but it had been a bit since she'd checked on her. She'd have to stay for a few days, but she was going to make it.

It was guilt that kept him rooted to the spot outside her door. Guilt and fear. If he blamed himself, there was no way that she wouldn't blame him. What if she wanted nothing to do with him? He wouldn't blame her. Hell, he didn't want anything to do with himself.

He needed to stop being a pussy and man up, but in his mind's eye he still saw her bleeding and broken in his arms. For a second he couldn't breathe, just thinking about it. She could've died and it would've been his fault. Shit, he needed to stop this shit and go the fuck in there. Straightening his shoulders, he opened the door, fearing for the worst but hoping for the best.

The sight that greeted him was not what he was expecting. His sister and Rachel were laughing (really? Fucking laughing? What the hell?) and they glanced up when he appeared in the doorway. "Noah." Rachel sent him a fuzzy smile. Yeah, she was fucking high on pain meds.

"Oh God, Rach." Puck tossed the flowers onto the table and hurried over to her side, carefully pulling her to him. He squeezed her tightly and he fought back the tears that were threatening to spill.

He didn't look up when he heard his sister stand and call out behind her, "I'll just go to the, uh, waiting room if you need me."

He pulled away after he heard the door shut, holding Rachel's face in his hand. "I could've lost you. Why the hell would you do something so stupid as to follow me?"

Rachel's hand slowly lifted to his face and used a finger to wipe away the tears that he hadn't been aware he'd been shedding. "I had to make sure that nothing happened to you, Noah. I love you and I couldn't let you go by yourself."

"So instead you get yourself shot. Great plan, Berry." He buried his face in her hair, not wanting to let her go.

"That wasn't part of the plan." Rachel laughed. "Trust me when I say that I did not ever think that _I_ would get shot."

Puck finally pulled away, sitting in the chair beside her bed while he held her hand. "I'm so sorry. It was totally my fault. I never thought that my old life would end up messing with what we have. I never meant for that to happen."

Rachel waved away his words. "This was _not_ your fault, Noah Puckerman, and don't you dare blame yourself. I should've listened to you when you told me to stay at home." She shrugged, wincing a little.

"Are you okay? Do I need to get the doctor?"

Puck was halfway out of his seat before she stopped him. "I'm okay. The stitches just pulled a little." She waved to the IV in her hand. "Whatever drugs they have me on keep me from feeling the pain."

Puck nodded. "Babe, has the doctor been in to see you yet?"

"Of course." Rachel nodded. "She told me about my crazy boyfriend who hunted her down to find out what was going on and was surprised that you weren't here."

It was his turn to shrug now. "Had to get flowers." He paused again, wondering how he was supposed to broach the subject. He guessed like everything else he did he should just be straightforward. "So she told you that you might never be able to have children?"

Rachel smiled at him sadly. "Yes, she did inform me of that." She squeezed his hand again. "Do not blame yourself for that either, Noah. She said that I _might_ not be able to, not that I couldn't. And if I can't, then there's always adoption."

"Babe, how can you not be mad?"

"Oh I'm plenty mad – at the man who shot me. But this is just a reminder that life is too short and that we should treasure what we have." She smiled up at him and Puck felt like his heart would burst out of his chest.

"Well you don't have to worry about that fucker anymore."

Rachel looked up at him sharply. "What do you mean?"

"I went down to see Sue while you were in surgery, part of the reason that I wasn't here. I beat the shit out of Chang, he's the one who shot you, and got Sue to agree to forgive the debt that Matt owes her."

"And how did you manage that?"

Puck shrugged. "It doesn't matter. She just said that me and Matt had to get out of her part of town. If it wasn't for you I'd say we should leave town completely, but you have to finish school." He shrugged again. Why the fuck was he doing that so much? He guessed that he just didn't know what else to do with himself. "The reason that I was so late though was because I went to see Matt and told him that he had to get out of the life or I'd bring him to her myself."

"And what did he say?"

"What the fuck could he say? He agreed and we packed up as much stuff as we could." He paused again. "I told him that he could stay at my place. I know that it's already crowded with Abby there but if I don't help him out, then how will he be able to go straight?"

Rachel nodded. "Good, I'm glad that you offered up your place. He'll have to sleep on the couch, though, because I do plan on spending all of my time there as well and I'm not giving up my spot in your bed to anyone."

"How the fuck did I get so lucky?" Puck leaned down and kissed her forehead.

"That's a very wonderful question. If you can't learn to watch your language, you might not be so lucky anymore." Rachel arched a brow at him and he couldn't but laugh.

"I'll work on it, but no promises." He shot her that smirk that he was known for before sobering. "I told Matt that I'd get him a job, but if he screws up, Rach, I'll kick him out. I'm not going to let anything happen to you again."

"I know you won't, Noah." She smiled up at him, but he could tell that she was getting tired.

"You should sleep, babe." He started to stand, slipping his hand from hers as her eyes slid closed.

Rachel's eyes shot open and she grabbed for his hand. "Wait, I didn't get a chance to tell you. I graduate this year, Noah, it's only a few more months and then I think that we should go away. Get out of this town. We can start all over."

"What?"

"Well, as you well know, I want to be a Broadway star so I was thinking that we could go to New York." She stopped for a moment. "We'll bring your sister of course, because we won't want to leave her here with your mother. And Matt, we'll invite him so that he can have his fresh start too." By the time the words were out of her mouth, her eyes had slid shut again and her grip on his hand had loosened.

Just like that she was out, and Puck couldn't help but think how cute she looked. He leaned down and kissed her on her forehead again. "Love you, babe," he whispered before heading for the door.

He'd been serious when he asked her how he'd gotten so lucky. He knew that he didn't deserve a girl like Rachel, but as long as she wanted him, he was going to be there for her. She was the first girl that he'd ever loved, and he hoped the last. She'd helped pull him out of a life that would have led to his death, helped him save his sister from the hell he'd grown up in, and helped him pull his best friend from a life that he would never have been able to give up. Although he knew she'd wave away the idea, she was like a guardian angel – his guardian angel.

* * *

Puck ran around the truck to pull open the door and help Rachel out. She was laughing as she batted at his hands. "This is not necessary, Noah. I can get myself out of the truck."

"Maybe, but I want to help you." Puck smiled before leaning down to kiss her. "C'mon let's get you upstairs. The doctor told you that you needed lots of rest and I'm not letting you do a thing. If you need anything, you just let me know and I'll get it."

Rachel shook her head as he led her into the building. "I'm completely capable of taking care of myself. You don't need to wait on me hand and foot."

"I know that, but I want to." He kissed her again before the doors of the elevator opened onto the floor for their apartment (because yes, it was hers as much as it was his). He quickly unlocked the door and pushed the door open to reveal Matt and Abby standing there, big grins on their faces.

Rachel eyed the two of them suspiciously. "What are the two of you up to?" Puck had brought Matt to the hospital to meet Rachel and the two had hit it off immediately. It had given him hope that they might be able to make this living arrangement work.

Abby ran up to her, hugging her gingerly. "Welcome home, Rach! We made you dinner!"

"Ahhh, that explains the smell." Puck wrinkled up his nose.

"Noah!" Rachel smacked his chest before turning back to Abby. "Ignore him. He has no idea what he's talking about, it smells delicious. What did you guys make?"

Puck watched as Rachel followed his sister in the kitchen, both talking a mile a minute.

"You know you got lucky with that one, don't you?" Matt asked him quietly.

"Absolutely." Puck shook his head. "I don't know why she puts up with me."

"Because I love you!" Rachel called from the kitchen. "Now get in here, I'm starving."

After they'd eaten, Puck and Rachel found themselves alone in the apartment as Matt and Abby had gone for ice cream. They were sitting on the couch, Puck with his arms wrapped around Rachel and her head on his chest.

"Looks like we'll be tripping all over one another for awhile."

Rachel pulled back to look up at him, a small smile on her face. "It doesn't matter, Noah. What matters is that we're there for one another. The rest will work out on its own."

Puck couldn't help but smile at her words. She was an optimist and he couldn't help but think that some of that was rubbing off on him, because he could almost believe her.


	12. Epilogue

**_A/N: I'd just like to thank all of you who have continued to read this story throughout my lack of updating. I hope that you've enjoyed the story, but it's now drawing to a close. Here is the epilogue and I hope that it is everything you hoped for._**

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_Three years later..._

Puck stood at the front of the temple, glancing at his watch. Where the hell was she? They should've started fifteen minutes ago and he was freaking out. He stared out at the people waiting for her with him and couldn't help but wondering how many of them were thinking that he'd been left at the altar. He'd be lying if he said that the thought hadn't crossed his mind.

"Man, calm the fuck down," Matt hissed in his ear.

Puck looked over his shoulder at his best friend, shaking his head. "Don't you know that you shouldn't fucking cuss in the temple?"

Matt laughed, shaking his head. "You need to calm down. I'm sure there was just a hold up. She'll be here."

Puck smiled, nodding. He knew that Matt was right. Rachel would be there; she was always there for him.

After she graduated in the spring, they had moved to New York City, bringing along both Abby and Matt. Things had been hard for all them as they adjusted to the new city, but it was the fresh start that they were all looking for. He and Matt had started working for a construction company right after they'd arrived and the owner took them under his wing and taught them how to run the business. When he'd decided to retire earlier in the year, he'd sold the company to them. They'd come so far from being dealers to being legitimate business owners. It was still hard for him to wrap his head around it sometimes.

Rachel had immediately began auditioning for roles, getting minor parts in off Broadway shows before getting her starring role a year after they'd gotten there. She'd landed her first minor role in a Broadway show only six months after that. But now she was going to be starring in _Wicked_, her dream role. They'd only found out a few days ago, but she was ecstatic and he couldn't have been happier for her.

Abby had blossomed in New York. It was like she had found herself when there was no one to hold her back. She'd excelled in school and now had a scholarship to Columbia in the fall. She wasn't sure what she wanted to do with her life yet, but she was on a path to become something more. Puck was glad that she would be staying in the city because it meant that she would still be close even though he and Rachel had bought a house in New Jersey.

Suddenly the doors opened and Puck exhaled a breath that he hadn't realized that he'd been holding. There was his baby sister looking beautiful in a pale blue strapless dress, her hair piled on top of her head. Abby had grown up into a beautiful young woman and he was glad to have been a part of that.

"Puck, your sister looks hot."

Puck glared at Matt. "Don't even fucking think about it," Puck hissed. "It's not too late for me to change my mind about you being my best man."

Matt held up his hands in surrender. "I was just saying..."

"Well keep it to yourself." Puck shook his head before turning back to watch his sister take her place. And then she was there. He couldn't see her face because she wore a veil (a stupid fucking Jewish tradition if he ever heard of one) but he knew that she looked beautiful. She wore a white strapless dress that was beautiful in its simplicity.

Her fathers walked her down the aisle, one on each side of her, and Puck couldn't take his eyes off of her. His eyes followed her as she walked towards him until she was in front of him. He nodded to her dads before taking her hand and helping her up the steps until she stood under the Chuppah (which was really just a fucking white canopy). He lifted the veil from her face and just stared at her for a moment. He'd been right. She looked fucking amazing.

The rabbi speaking drew his attention from her, but he still held onto her hand. He wasn't really paying attention to the words, but when the goblet came to him, he tasted the wine before passing it to Rachel.

Then it was time for the rings so he took it from Matt and turned to his beautiful bride. "Behold, you are consecrated to me with this ring according to the law of Moses and Israel." He slid the plain band onto her hand until it was snug against her engagement ring. He didn't give two shits about the actual ceremony, didn't care what he had to say. He just wanted her to be his wife.

Matt passed Rachel his ring and she smiled up at him as she slid it onto his finger. "I am my beloved's and my beloved is mine."

Puck knew he should be paying attention to the rabbi, but he just kept his eyes locked on Rachel's while the man droned on. Soon the goblet was back in his hand while the rabbi recited the seven blessings. He drank after each blessing, but he still kept his eyes on her. Once the rabbi had finished he passed the goblet to Rachel who drank from it.

The rabbi spoke again, but he still didn't pay attention to what the man was saying. In fact he just wanted him to get the fuck on with it. He wanted his woman to truly be his, to become Rachel Puckerman. Finally the ceremony came to a close and a glass was handed to him wrapped in a linen cloth. He slammed his foot down on it and cheers of "Mazel tov" were called out to them.

And then finally she was his wife. He smiled down at her, pulling her close. "I love you, Rachel Puckerman."

Her answering smile made him light headed. "I love you, too, Noah Puckerman."

He leaned down and kissed her, lips pressing possessively over hers. And even though they were at the temple, he may have slipped her a little tongue. And there nothing anyone could do about it, because she was his forever.


End file.
